Want a baby SO badly

I want to have another baby in a crazy way. And I want a boy like my life depended on it, but I will never, ever tell my husband that.
We have been trying for only 8 months but our first baby was an accident after we'd been told we would never have children, which is why this is so incredibly heartbreaking. What if we can't have anymore children? Can I be happy with one beautiful daughter? Shouldn't I be glad that we were fortunate to have her? Why do I ache so badly to conceive again and why do I long for a baby boy?

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