My boyfriend doesn't know I kissed my bestfriend

I am honestly, truly, deeply in love with my boyfriend of 2 years. Recently I went to my best guy friend's place for a house party... This is what happened.

We've been best friends for 4 years now (Longer than I've known my boyfriend.) A couple years ago he moved and he now lives a good distance from where I live, and I don't get to see him often. We still maintain our friendship and we've always been very close. I was invited to his house for a rather elaborate party, which of course, being as close as we are, I told him I would attend. Because there was going to be alcohol at the party, there would be no one to drive me back to my place, and so I would have to stay the night.

My boyfriend and I are very honest and open with each other, so of course, we spoke about it. But my boyfriend is a jealous man and he wasn't too fond of the idea of me staying at his place because of all the other men that would be at the party that he wouldn't know. But after much reassurance he accepted that it would be okay, because he trusts me and he knows that I trust my best friend to look out for me.

When I arrived at my friend's house, everything was going well, I called my boyfriend every few hours to assure him that everything was fine, and I promised him I wouldn't drink too much.

I hadn't eaten much that day and the alcohol got to me much quicker than I'd expected. I can normally tolerate a good amount of alcohol, but before I knew it I was stumbling all over the place. It just hit me so fast. My friend was by my side taking care of me. He insisted we go outside to get some fresh air to sober me up a little. He had just gone through a bad break up and he had also had a tad too much to drink.. We got talking outside his house and somehow ended up kissing.

Once I realized what I was doing I immediately stopped. I told him that he needed to stop because I loved my boyfriend. I took myself away from the party for the remainder of the night and spent about an hour on the phone with my man telling him how much I loved him with slurred speech until I fell asleep.

My friend and I talked about it and both agreed it was a mistake and our friendship is doing just fine. But my boyfriend doesn't know that this happened.. and I know it'll just break his heart if I told him. Especially how much reassuring I did for him that night.. and because I told him I'd never cheat on him in any way with any one.

I love my boyfriend.. but I feel terrible that now I have a secret with him. We tell each other everything and I feel like this is a stain on our otherwise clean relationship. Should I tell him? Or keep it to myself. I know it's only something small, but it tears me apart thinking about.


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  • My opinion pretty much falls in line with this blog post:

    because it was more than a full on kiss, and if my partner was to instigate it, I would want to know why. But if it was the other person, and my partner did what I would expect (protect the integrity of our relationship), then there wouldn't be a need for me to know.

  • I think you should tell him because if he does find out he will be more mad. Just say to him that you got really really drunk and kiss him

  • Listen, I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for over 3 and a half years. We trust each other completely, and are incredibly open about everything.
    I think I relate to your boyfriend on the jealous yet trusting part. I'm sure he advised you against what he thinks might happen, but he doesn't try to control you, so he trusted that you understood the risks and told you to be careful.
    With everything you said, I would be destroyed if my girlfriend did that to me. But he will still love you. Trust is a fragile thing, so you will have to re-earn it. But he will still love you. So yes, you absolutely have to tell him. If you don't you will be destroying an otherwise wonderful relationship. But you two are stable, I'm sure. You can come back from this. But the longer you don't tell him, the worse the news will be to hear. I promise you. That is because while you withhold that information, every moment you spend talking to him is a tiny betrayal. And those bring even heavier damage.
    You seem like a wonderful girl. But you will let him down, and more than just this once. And he will let you down too. But every time, once you heal, you'll be even closer than before.
    So if you love him, let him know. But it will hurt, and he will need time. But he will still love you. And as long as you stay true in everything you tell him, eventually, he should forgive you. Because that's what love is.
    And in the future, trust his wisdom about things like that. He sees situations with realistic, yet protective, eyes. He will always look out for you, as well as himself, and for your relationship.

  • Dnt tell. Its minor

  • Somethig similar happen to me but in my case the ralationship with my boyfriend its not good at all and i have being kissing one of my best froend more than once and trust me i dont think that telling to your boyfriend its a smart idea . Why he should now ? You did it and thats it , its a secret between your friend and you . I think if you tell to your bf you are gonna loose a lots of important parts of the relation and i think that youbare gonna loose your friend too because your bd ita gonna b so p*** about everything that you are not gonna b able to see your friend . At least thats what i think

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