Take off that self obsorbed mask and look at the world.
Im not fat, or exseptionally ugly, but im certainly not anything special. I may repulse myself but i accept who i am. But it feels, despite who i am or how i act, people will shy away from me. No matter how alike we may be.Or if i try to change. Its all about beauty, and it is of know help when your surrounded by model-material girls. Literally.
my closest friend of which i am comfortable around everything but what matters. My depression.
She has been approached by modeling agencies and such but turns them down, she has had a chance with every guy, and the only male friends of mine have been fall offs from her stunning looks. people only to approach me because i am the most reliable source.
Ive never had a guy interested in me, enough to approach me, or learn more about me. My sister, an almost other perfect example. With hip long hair and a petite figure, shes intriguing and opinionative, a bit of a geek, an a total rebel. Not the brightest in the book, but certainly follows her own path.
my 'friends' have been known to 'ditch' me just to hang out with her, or look at her.
how am i to compete with any of this sort of stuff. People dont even give me the benefit of a single glance.
if this is all about my depression, and there is no advice to make people 'like you' without changing yourself, how the f** are you supposed to get better with drugs, or taliking, or any other crap people pretend to know about. People dont like me, no matter who i am, how i act, how quite, or loud, or bitchy. No matter how much i care or give. No matter how close we get, or how much pain they put me in, its never enough.
Its all about looks. And it seems i just dont fit in any catigory, not even the ugly fat chick. Im just lost. No one will walk down a path that doesnt exist.