Stop confusing me.

...My best friend started dating this guy. It was a long distance relationship. He lived in Florida and she lived in Colorado. The funny part is, I lived in Florida also. relatively close to her boyfriend. And since she was my best friend, she gave me his number in case of emergency or if I wanted to talk to him about her. Well, we started talking and I developed a huge crush on him. But I didn't tell anyone because I knew it was wrong and that I shouldn't ruin it between them. They seemed very happy and I was happy for them. One weekend, he decided that it would be a good time to fly out to Colorado so he could finally meet his girl (they started talking through a mutual friend. they've only ever texted, called, and skyped). I was excited because I would be able to skype both of them at the same time. Which meant I could see and talk to him without her getting suspicious. The first night was great. They seemed very happy. But by the next few days, everything went downhill. She told me she wasn't attracted to him. And he wasn't passionate about anything. And she basically just kept telling me everything she didn't like about him. Picking him apart from head to toe. I began to defend him. Not only because he wasn't in the conversation to defend himself, but I liked him. She just kept pushing him away and he would keep texting me asking if she said if he did anything wrong..it was killing me. I didn't like seeing either of them unhappy. But the more she talked about what she didn't like..the more I started to like him. So finally I told her my feelings. She wasn't angry at all, and I knew she wouldn't be. But after a few hours she started getting jealous of my feelings for him. She wanted to feel how I felt towards him. On his third night there, that's when all of the drama really picked up. She told him that she didn't have the strongest of feelings for him and he was devastated. I was the first person he texted after that. He was asking if he was too boring or ugly or if anything was wrong with him. I took almost 40 minutes to type out a text that explained how great he was. And how much I liked talking to him. But of course, at the end, I had to include "..even though I'm not the girl you want to hear this from.." And he said nothing about it. Eventually we all fell asleep. and I woke up the next morning to see a text from my best friend. "I told him I love him." And now I don't know how I should feel. I'm really happy that she said that because I know that would make him happy. But I'm also a little upset because I'm afraid she's just saying that because she's jealous of my feelings for him. I keep telling her that there is no need to be jealous of anything. Yeah, I like him, but he doesn't like me! And there is no way I could ever measure up to how great of a person she is. SO I guess I confess that I love my best friend's boyfriend. and it sucks.

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  • Geeze, you've been upfront, supportive and honest to a fault. Now you need to back off and let your friend's relationship with the guy fall apart. Think about it: they can't make it work when they're together so how can the long-distance thing possibly work? Soon, you will have a chance to hook up with him and find out if he has mutual feelings toward you. Wait and don't get into their relationship, let it fail on its own.

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