Does she want me the way I want her.
I get on the bus for school in the morning it's 6:40 a.m I'm still tired and can barely open my eyes, but when the bus gets to the next stop I am wide awake cause I see her. In her jacket and jeans, with her long black silky hair almost completely covering her face and her glasses that make me look even closer into her eyes, she is so beautiful. I don't her enough to call her a friend or even and aquaitnance but I do know that with her quiet way she is dying to say something or just burst out with some type of feeling. I can have a horrible day from 1st hour to 3rd hour but when I get to 4th hour I can't help but smile. I don't even talk to her and she doesn't sit next to me but their is something about her that I can't resist. I wish I had it in me to make a move and find out if a average body sized, not very athletic, and not too pretty female is her type or not. I have never been so attracted to a women before but I can't help myself. I have always liked men and wanted a guy but when I see her I just want to say forget the rest of world and walk right up and kiss her. She has the same lunch as me but I do not sit with her and I don't even know if she sits with anyone or not. After lunch I don't see her for the rest of the school day but she is still on my mind. Finally, it's time to get back on the bus to go home. I sit in the front seat and she sits one or two seats behind me. I always look up at the mirror and watch her listening to her music blocking out the rest of the people on the bus. I watch her through the mirror the entire ride home hoping that she will look up at the mirror and make eye contact with me. She doesn't really talk, smile, or even laugh. I want to be the one that makes her do all them things, gosh do I want to see that smile and hear her laugh. She is so gorgeous. If only I wasn't so scared of being rejected. I have always wondered what my parents would think of me if I was a lesbian or a bisexual, I think they would be extremely against it and disappointed but if I had her to love I wouldn't care about dissapointing anyone. I know that I don't know her but I swear I feel something for her and its way more then l*** and curiosity. I don't know what to do but I do know I want to hold her hand, walk her to class, brush her hair off her face, kiss her, hug her, and be who she needs me to be. I want her to want me. Someone please give me and idea of what I can do.