Always Silent

I am in love with my fiance', we have basically had 2 relationships. Our "last" relationship and "this one". In the "last" one I got pregnant with his son, he cheated on me several times, we broke up every five min, we lived together at my parents, and it ended when my sister accused him of making passes at her(she is only 15) and my parents kicked him out.
this time around has been amazing though, He stays at home and watches our son in the apartment that is a couple floors above my office.
well the other day we had a big blow out fight where (i realize i was wrong) had lied to him about something and he had continued to question me and i would add details and the last time i had told him the whole truth, but he was questioning me once again and wasnt believing me. so i made up that more had happened thaan what had. well at the end of the fight we made up and was crying and stuff.
the next moring i went through his phone for the first time in about 6 months. I found a conversation in there of him and this girl, he has a conversation with a girl, thats no big deal, but what is the big deal is that:
1-He asked her to watch our son-I dont know this girl and we had agreed that opur son would never be around someone unless we both gave permission.
2-he was talking to her about how he used to have a crush on her- no big deal if he hadnt then also said that he still wonders what s** would be like with her and asked her if she would be will ing to have s** with her if he were single
3- when he went to pick up his w-2 from his old work he picked her up and hung out with her- would have ben ok but he kept it from me, took really long time at his work, and had her around my son.
4-he told her about how he does not want a family and he still wants to be young and blah blah blah-I have asked him many times in the last few days if he is sure that he wants to be with me and if he is sure that he wants to be with me and he says he is

This whole thing happened about 2 weeks before the fight btw.
I dont know what to do? help?

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  • that's the problem with kids having kids. you guys haven't experienced anything, haven't had the chance to explore , but wonder why your world goes to h*** when you're "playing house". in this case, 1) i wouldn't say to leave the guy but at least keep tabs on where he goes and with who. the name of the game is accountability and since both of you didn't have any before you two decided to become a 'family' at least you can try to get some now. 2) instead of b******* at one another and trying to figure out who's doing what, learn to communicate. the earlier you learn to do this the better the quality of life will be for both you and your child.

  • It sounds like the problems from your "last" relationship is making an appearance into "this one" relationship. What do you do? I think if this guy is someone you want to marry, then you get everything out into the open and find out for sure if he's going to be able to leave his single life behind. You obviously don't trust him, and with good reason. This guy is clearly not ready for commitment, marriage or being a father. The question is, how long are you going to wait around for him to grow up? If says he really wants to stay with you, then get you both into couple counseling. And see if you can solve these issues.

  • He'll keep cheating on you girl. Seriously, get out of there. There are so many red flags in your post. Don't you think you deserve better?

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