I have no more friends. Every day I dread going to school; hiding at lunch in the library or bathroom. My mom used to yell at me, she would ask me why I remain so antisocial when I am so funny and intelligent at home. I'm too tired and too scared to talk to other people. On top of my social anxiety, I've developed binge eating disorder. Three days a week I sit and eat and feel so hurt, so guilty the next morning. The days following I exercise brutally to keep my weight down, but it has been creeping steadily up, adding to my low self-esteem. I just want to find some kind and intelligent people to talk to. Everyone in my A.P classes turns out to be rude or superficial in one way or another...

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  • I wish I knew you because you sound so much like myself in high school. I'm blind so got made fun of a lot. I was just too different for those in my small town. Take it from someone who has cried in the bathroom at lunch many, many times, it does get better after high school. People really do grow up. Not all of them, but a great majority will eventually feel bad about how they were. You're not as alone as you think.

  • Maybe some counseling could help you bring out your sense of humor with people outside your home. It sounds like with your humor and intelligence you have a lot to share with others. And it's sad for whatever reasons you are unable to at this 'stage' of your life. These behaviors can be changed.

    I was somewhat like you, probably worse in other ways, but I did a lot of work on myself and rose above the barriers that held me down socially. I didn't become a social butterfly, but I leaned how to get along far better with people and that served me well in my life and in my work.

    You could do this too, probably better than I did. I should have taken advantage of the services of a counselor when I was a teenager. My life would have been so much easier and I believe I would have made far less costly mistakes.

    Consider my words, and my best to you.

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