Love or not?

I'm a thirteen year old girl. With my first boyfriend. We've been together for four months now. I told him that I love him and he said the same to me. I personally believe I am more mature than other girls my age but if u disagree with me, I understand. My boyfriend, he's my first kiss, my first boyfriend, first hand holder,etc. the furthest I have gone, and will go, is a kiss. He is very sweet and understanding. Hes always there to help me when I'm feeling down. He so hilarious and he's the class clown. He's very smart and like me, taking a higher level math class. We have all of our classes together which is really weird cuz usually that doesn't happen in middle school. He tells me he loves me more than I love him, but I tell him that's not true. And he asks why I think that, but I just shrug and tell him I don't know....but the thing is, I do know. About a month and a half ago, he told me that he also liked another girl. He said he was very sorry and he told me he felt very bad about it and I believed him. And I told him to just get some space and think about what he wants and tell me later. Meanwhile, I was telling myself I wasn't going to be a stupid little girl and cry over a boy but the next minute, I find myself not able focus on anything but him and crying. Now, a month after that happened, he tells me he loves me so much and will never break up with him and I believe him. But every time I see him talking to that girl, I feel so hurt remembering what it felt like when he told me. But that girl is like one of the most popular girls in our class, and she's so pretty, she's skinnier than me, she's smarter than me, everything about her is perfect. And honestly, I think she likes me boyfriend. And I can't help but wonder why he's still with me. Is he just settling for me? Or does he really not think other as anything more than a good friend and he really cares for me? Talking to my family about this is out of the question because they are against middle school dating. Talking to my friends about it is put of the question because most of them hate him. So, that leave me to anonymously post my problems on the Internet for all to see. I ask you to please not criticize me and if u do, to do so in an appropriate manner. Please just offer some advice on what I just do :) I very much areciate it

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  • Well. If any1 sees this post again, and wants to help, don't bother. We broke up three weeks ago. On his birthday, he cheated on me and made out with my friends ex girlfriend. And throughout our relationship, he was sexting and sending nude pics of himself to another girl...so...I'm over him :) lol
    -poster of this confession

  • Sorry to hear that. You seem like a strong, mature girl and I'm sure you'll go on to great things. Good luck and lots of love :)

  • Girl, you deserve better than that nasty piece of shiz... You're obviously WAY better than him anyway. Sorry it didn't work out the way we all would have hoped :'(

  • this boy really is a wonderful creation. im 15 and am single with 1 detachment. first of all feel urself lucky dat u've got such an honest boyfriend. in my views he really loves u. see we all feel attracted to diff people at times , bt this doesnt mean dat we fall in luv with them. stick to him. make him feel loved. dats all it takes to have love. i prsnally m not experienced enough to advise u, bt see, love is not so easy. if u love him, u love him with all his virtues and faults. jst ask him for some talk on a nice evenning n kiss him. next day, if he prsonaaly comes to talk to u, however s*** it might be, and looks in your eyes with the same feeling a ur first kiss, u have him. he is yours.

  • <3 thanks for the advice :) I really hope you're right and I'll try to do that.
    -poster of this confession

  • He seems genuinely sorry. but if he does it again i would say to break up with him and seek support from ur friends. The first relationship is always the hardest

  • Ok. That sounds like the right thing to do. And other have said the same :) thanks for the advice. And I had no idea the first was the hardest, I thought it would be about the same with each one.
    -poster of this confession

  • Oh girl :( you are so much better. A guy like that never deserves a second chance. But the fact that he's still with you and not going after that girl is highly applaudable. Ask yourself, do you love him? And if your answer is yes, stay with him. Make it work.

    Xoxo

  • Yeah. I do love him very much. I have been making it work, so far, hopefully it will stay that way :) and thank you for the advice :)
    -poster of this confession

  • Oh My God.
    You Like My Other Twin (I Already have a twin)
    I Had this Boy friend a while back.
    i miss him. he moved in december.
    he was my frist kiss also.
    he was the class clown.
    Super Funny,
    Super Cute,
    I Was Envy-ed by all the girls in grade 7!
    But then before he moved, the same thing happened to me.
    He Dumped me for a diffrent girl!
    a ratty grade 6 girl
    I dont know why he picked her over me.
    Shes Kinda Ugly & Wierd.
    EVERYONE Agreed.
    His Bestfriends Told him to dump her & go back to me
    I Dident work.
    Now, I have to wait till after christmas this year for him to come back.
    he told me he likes me.
    On facebook he did this date or pass thing & he said he'd date me again.
    So Yeah...
    Your Cool :)

  • Haha wow :P lol good job getting him back
    -poster of this confession

  • *First

  • I apologize for sounding motherly ( if I end up coming off in that manner ). I have a 13 yr old daughter , although it in no way makes me an expert on this. But in my opinion, it sounds as if he has taken the time to make a reflection and decided it is you that he loves and not this other girl. Notice the wording . He said he LOVES YOU, and you said earlier that a month or so before he told you that he LIKES another girl. All through out our lives, even though we may be partnered with someone - there's going to be times where each person is going to be attracted to someone else. It doesn't mean that our partner is going to act upon the attraction. I have to give him props in being honest with you and telling you upfront about how he feels.
    One thing that I have learned when it comes to relationships - is that you HAVE to have communication. It bothers you. You've admitted it ! So why not sit down with him after school or on the weekend ( definitely NOT during lunch time or in class. There's too many distractions ) and open up to him. He's your boyfriend for a reason! If you can't open up to him and share ALL of your emotions ( the love stuff is great - but its' tough yet necessary to share the hurts, too!), then there's no point in remaining in the relationship. Try your best to not be on the offense when approaching him. Tell him something along the lines of " you know how I tell you that I love you more than you love me? And you ask "How do I know that and I say I don't know? Well.... remember the time a few months ago when...." and then say " I know that you love me. I know that it's me you want to be with. But I need to know how you truly feel about xxxxx. Do you still feel the same way about her? Are you just friends?"
    There's nothing wrong with just talking your feelings out. But also remember. You're only 13. The reality is - you're going to have your heart broken many times before you end up in the arms of "mr right". It doesn't mean to shield yourself from every guy. It doesn't mean to get lost in a sea of sadness. Heart break is a part of life... a right of passage, in a way. A part of life's little lessons. Focus on your school work more than you do boys...and you will get further in life ! My 13 yr old is in the National Juniors Honor Society, as well as advanced placement classes. Her aspiration in life is to become a Pathologist. Her dream is totally obtainable IF she keeps her nose buried in the books and keeps her grades as high as possible.
    I just don't want to think about any child taking the same road that I took. I was concerned with boys when I was very young. I ended up dropping out of school ( after I was already enrolled early into a wonderful collegiate program ). I fell into a hard , vicious partying lifestyle, have had 2 failed marriages, 3 kids ( all from different fathers ) and am just now at a crossroads where I'm able to finally obtain what I tried to so many years ago - by finally being able to be licensed in my home state to work for an outstanding insurance company. At 30 years of age, when most people are starting to prepare their nest eggs for retirement - I'm barely starting my career! Just be careful, is all i'm trying to say.

  • Omg thank you so much! You really helped and I appreciate it very much :) I probably will talk to him sometime...I just have to get the guts to do it. I will focus more on school but I really really do care about this guy.
    And despite your past incidents, you sound like a very wonderful person and mother :)
    -poster of this confession

  • Dude, ur 13...just dont think about love rite now, k? focus on ur studies.

  • I know...but I'm doing well in school. Right now I have all A's and one B in a highschool math course. But thank you for your opinion :)
    -poster of this confession

  • allright i'm back from my reflection's to say it's up to you do you want to (unknowingly) keep him or would you rather know for sure if he "loves" you or would you rather (unknowingly) dump him... anyway's back to my reflection piece child enjoy life

  • ok if i may he has so many first's with you that that is the only reason your attracted to him because our brains are hard wired to when something feel's good from one item the first time it start's releasing dopamine (feel good chemical) early when your just nearby the person probably the only reason you think it's love when your 14... any way's i have to go reflect on my life and the reason i never had a gf piece

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