I took advantage of my friend

About 8 months ago, an email went around looking for volunteers at my college to be test subject for medical exams. The email stated that there may be partial nudity involved and that there was payment of $100. One of my friends joked that she'd take off her clothes for $100 dollars, no problem.
I have a crush and that gave me an idea. The next saturday I called her up and asked could I come over as my laptop was broken and I wanted her advice. She said yes.
When I got there I showed her $300 and told her that it was for her. I said that she was to go to her room, strip, and that for every half hour she spent naked, I'd give her $50. She was really shocked. But money is pretty tight for her so she said yes in the end.
She went up to her room, took off her clothes and came back down. She was very embarrassed and tried to hide herself with her hands, but I told her that that wasn't part of the deal. So she put her hands by her sides and sat down in one chair and I sat in another. We watched a movie together (though I spent way more time looking at her).
Every half hour, I got up and dropped a $50 note on the table and then sat back down. We never spoke and her eyes never left the TV. At the end of the three hours, after I dropped the last note, she brought her knees up to her chest and said "please leave". I didn't know what to say so I gathered my stuff up and left, asking as I went for her to "please don't tell anyone about this".

We haven't spoken since then. I don't think she told anyone about it as no-one treats me any different and we still hang out as part of a group with other friends, but we haven't interacted at all. I have no idea what to say.
I feel really bad and guilty but I'm not sure how to make things better. I feel very disgusted with myself too. Does anyone have any advice??

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  • Any chance for a relationship with this lady is gone. Look at the brightside, she would probably take money from anyone to show her parts.

  • Agreed. Tell her you were stupid etc, and you shouldn't have done it for money, especially since you like her, etc, which makes it worse. And DON'T then turn around take back your apology in some way. Don't say "Well, I was stupid, but I did it because I like you." Apologies like that just grate. If you like someone, you don't do this.

    And also just remember: good people do stupid things. Don't generalize from what you did to EVERYTHING you do.

  • All you can do is apologize. Maybe by you saying not to tell anyone, it seemed like you two were doing something wrong. And possibly after thinking about what she was doing for money, she felt shame and embarrassment. That will be something she just has to process for herself. She had every option to stop at anytime or to not take her clothes off. Could she have been expecting something else to happen?

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