Controlling & manipulative behaviors

I have a family member who is emotionally controlling and manipulative half of the time. The other half of the time, she's a sweet woman. I really don't know what's the best way to handle someone like that, especially when you're not sure what mood they're in or how they're going to treat you that particular day. This person is very close to my family and she's not someone I can just write off. Basically, this person is difficult to deal with at times & creates a lot of stress for me. How can I truely love and respect someone who causes me so much anxiety?

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