Self destruction

I've been trying to kill myself for the past year now. Not with a rope or a gun. I did once with pills, but I didn't have enough. But since other ways are so messy and obvious. I just don't eat anymore. I cut, but never deep enough. It is comforting to know that if I did hit a vein, I wouldn't care. This confession sounds very whiny, like I want attention. I don't. I just really wanted theses thoughts that continue to take over my head, out. But it is a little bothersome to know that no one truly gives a f***. But that's life and I swear I'll find a way out.

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  • A a low point I once had a passing thought about ending my life. I hated my self for even thinking that way, Its such a cowards way out. My life is not perfect right now but I believe that I and everyone else are alive for a reason. But having that though gave me a new out look on life. Which was if my only option was death then why not live without fear for what might happen. Then that thought lead to a much greater thought. That fear dose not exist. I mean think about it when we fear something it has not even happened yet we fear a possible outcome in the future. Then isn't fear just a socially expectable form of insanity???. My point is live your life without fear which doesn't exists

  • Pease don't kill yourself because you would be causing a permanent problem for a pain that is only temporary. If you did that you would be passing down all of your pain to your loved ones. I don't know if your one of those people that believes in fate, but I do. I think that maybe it was fate that you didn't have enough pills because you're supposed to live. Everyone has a purpose in life and you should stay to find out what it is. I know it may be hard to eat with all the pain but try your best to get *something* in your stomach because I don't want you to starve yourself. I have never cut myself before, but I have scratched myself and I understand what it's like to feel like you can't stop or that you *want* it to kill you. I am currently going on three weeks now without self-mutilating and I am so proud of myself. Everytime I wanted to hurt myself I just quickly grabbed onto my lucky stone and rubbed it raw. It helped because it was very smooth yet it had lots of edges so it was interesting and distracted me. I also take anti-anxiety pills and I feel like a completely different person, but in a good way of course. I don't think that your confession sounds whiny at all. It's not that you want attention, it's that you just want help. Here's my advice: every morning when you wake up, no matter how bad of a mood you may be in, tell yourself, "I am in a fantastic mood today and I am a beautiful person!" You may not believe it when you say it but the brain is so powerful that just saying the words can change your thought process. And by the way, someone out there *does* care, including me. Just don't go... good luck! :)

  • Fnd help. Don't worry, life is not the deep black abyss that it seems like. You are not a coward, you are not worthless, and you are not being a whiner. Learning the beauty of everything you (not a hypothetical you, the actual YOU, dear confessor) can do (physically and mentally) can be the most difficult and wonderful thing a person can do, but it's so much harder to do alone. Find a counselor, a family member, or a friend to help you. You can do it! <3

  • Suicide is a cowards way out.

  • Sicide may seem like a cowards way out, but a person can take so much until they decide they just wanna burst. I mean, yeah, kind is like a cowards way out, but what do they do? Just wake up everyday hurting inside?

  • Sicide *

  • You were given a gift... that you still haven't unwrapped... its called LIFE. Your life is precious, you DO have a purpose in life sweetheart... don't give up so easily ... You can laugh and smile and help others that are going thru the same thing you are.. I know of someone that Loves you... He gave you that Gift, he loves you no matter what you have done, what you think, no matter what you have failed on, no matter what he loves you and HE made you... His name is Jesus and he can save your life. Talk to him.. he will comfort you and love you like no one ever has and ever will.. i promise... your story was once mine.

  • Im glad that jesus helped you out of your darkness. And I'm also glad that you have that to hold on to for the rest of your life. But I am not and never again will be religious. I don't mean to offend you, it just isn't my thing.

  • Look up borderline personality disorder.

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