What do I do?

I'm 21 and I have a boyfriend and we have been together for a year and a half now. He is a great guy and I really do love him but there is a lot of stuff that bothers me. He is 26 and doesn't have his s*** together at all and he lives with me at my aunts house and has a s***** part time job. He has tons of debt and plays video games for hours instead of spending time with me. There are good things though as well, he helps me out a lot by taking my mom to work if I can't, he rubs my back most nights to help me fall asleep(granted it takes me like 5 mins to fall asleep) but he is sweet and generous just not at the level I would like him to be. So I have been pretty distant lately and going out with my friends a lot. About a month ago I had a one night stand, I was drunk he was hot and from out of town we went back to his hotel room one thing lead to another and we never spoke again. Then the other night I went out with my bff and we met up with this guy she liked and I invited an old friend from college to come out and of course we had always kind of liked each other but the opportunity just never arose. Well it did that night we slept together and cuddled and the next day I left. My problem is I don't know if I should tell my boyfriend. I don't care about these guys and I know the reason I did it is because 1 i was drinking and 2 i was feeling underappreciated at home. My boyfriend and I havent slept together in 2 months, not that I don't want to it just doesn't happen. I know most people are going to say you s*** and w**** and you should tell him because it's not fair to him, but if I do tell him it will only hurt him a lot and I can't bear to see him hurt. It breaks my heart just thinking about it. I know I shouldn't have done what I did, but I am only human and humans are animals too with animalistic instincts. I feel like he would be happier not knowing. I know I would be and I only say that because if someone loved me and I mean truely loved me and had a drunken night of l*** that meant nothing then I would not want to know. It woukd ruin my world to find that out. I just want a little insight please don't be to harsh.

Sep 16, 2012

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  • Sometimes it's hard to tell you what to do, sit down and have a long talk with him, find out what his goals are in life, them you know, what you said in your words tell me all he wanted a place to stay, please let us know what happened with your relationship okay, bye.

  • You shouldn't tell him but should break up with him , don't be a coward , not cool cheating on a live in boyfriend , especially while both of u are living at your aunts house , she ain't trying to hear your drama n I doubt u want her to know u been cheating on your boyfriend..,

  • Looks like the only problems you have is that you can't talk to your boyfriend about problems like you not f****** in over 2 months, and you justify your sadness and neglect in the matter by sleeping with random dudes then seek online help for it. Your biggest problem is that you want a mature relationship and you cant keep your legs closed. You say you dont want to hurt him by telling him well if you really didnt want to hurt him you wouldnt have f***** 2 dudes, lady. You f***** yourself here, you got just as much growing up to do as he does. Youre both pathetic, squandering life.

  • Exactly. You are a walking contradiction and just another stupid, selfish a****** that wants to justify your whorish behavior by saying you don't feel appreciated or wanted. That's where communication comes into to play. It's easy for people to get off base in a relationship. But that's when talks should take place, maybe your boyfriend has no idea how you feel and if you actually told him instead of being a f****** s***, he would have immediately changed his behavior..but you choose the latter. Don't blame your relationship for YOUR unfaithful behavior, a******. That's just who you are, enjoy.

  • Wow you don't have to be such a d***. I can pretty much admit that i f***** myself over.

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