I was in love with my best friend. After he found out, he stopped talking to me. Now he's in a happy relationship with a girl who once told me she would never be attracted to him. The irony!
I'm 27 years old and I live with my Mother. I work very hard for very little and I feel like I'll never move up in my job. My Mom often complains about me not doing anything around the house -- but I find that funny as I spend most of my nights picking up after her and cleaning her dishes. Guess we each have different perceptions of realty. She's involved with a married man -- who used to be our neighbor -- he never pays for anything, is a racist, and constantly jabs at me so I become enraged.
I have a debilitating food addition which has brought me to 300 pounds.
My father has chosen his new family over me.
Every night, I go to bed wishing someone was there with me. And I wake up every morning feeling lonely and wishing I could just go back to sleep. I get to work and fake being friendly and happy -- but really, I'm miserable. I've spent my entire life pleasing people, making them laugh, making them feel better, taking criticism to prevent it from going to others. I wish I just had someone to talk to, someone who cared about me. Or, at the very least, I wish I was able to afford my own place so I could sit and waste away by myself -- in peace.
I keep thinking -- or maybe I'm hoping -- that someday I will be truly happy. Someday I might have someone special in my life.
People have told me I need to find my own happiness. I've been alone for my entire life. I was once happy with being alone. Now, it's just sad.