If it wasn't for her...
I had a fuckbuddy i saw on and off for five years. I accidently fell pregnant despite using protection. When i told him he abandoned me but i decided id raise the baby myself. When i had 8 weeks to go he showed up and said he wanted to be a part of everything and he was sorry and he had been to rehab to clean himself up. I never even knew he was on anything.
After our baby was born he told me he loved me and wanted a life with me. He called us 'his girls' and i felt so loved and happy. Then he changed. I found out he was smoking meth. I tried to help him and he keeps pushing me away. So I killed him out and im trying to move on and just focus on my daughter but he keeps msging me and saying he loves me. Then i ask him if there is anyway i can help him and he yells at me. He's made me hate myself so much. I changed my number and he started rocking up at my house. I got a restraining order but despite EVERYTHING i still love him and wish i could help.
If it wasn't for my daughter Im fairly certain id kill myself. Im only living because she needs me and i love her too much to be that selfish. I wish he'd never come back into my life. It hurts too much to love him.