I was 14 when I was pregnant. Turned 15, and got an abortion 4 months into my pregnancy. I'm 16 & diagnosed with depression. I think of killing myself constantly so that I could be with my baby. I hate everything about myself. I try to forget. I am so sorry, for giving up my baby. I felt my baby kick & I will never forgive myself. I hate my parents for forcing me to get rid of my baby. They left me when I needed them the most. I will never forget what they told me, "you're an embarrassment to the family. if you don't get rid of it we will put you in an adoption home." They wonder why I hate them so much now. I do everything I can to get away from reality. I steal anything I can get away with, I eat my emotions, I pierce myself to cause harm to myself, I will never make that mistake ever again and cut myself, leaving evidence... I smoke weed daily now, & I abuse my anti-depressants and pop 7 pills to get away when I can't get my hands on any weed, I binge drink to get away, I have s** with guys I don't like and pretend I enjoy it. I'm just trying to escape this miserable life. I wish this was a nightmare, I want to wake up in the abortion room & stop everything.