Workplace crush

I have a crush on my boss. I am a teacher, and he is an assistant principal. I wouldn’t say he is physically attractive, but he is well groomed and has an amazing personality. He is confident and assertive while showing kindness and compassion for others. He is very passionate about his work and has helped me improve my teaching. I would love to be able to spend more time with him because he was an outstanding classroom teacher before becoming an administrator and I know I could learn a lot from him. Also, he believes in me when I don’t belive in myself. He challenges me, but at the same time, I feel good around him because he is supportive and encouraging. Maybe I have a crush on that– the support and encouragement. I really want to please him and I constantly hope he will recognize that I am trying to do a good job. I wish I had more opportunities to talk to him, he is just so busy. I am married and my husband is a good man so I feel bad about this crush. I want to tell myself I am just experiencing admiration for an authority figure who is a good leader, but then I start to fantsize and I realize that there is a true physical attraction component here, based on the attractive personality qualities. He is not married, and I wish I could tell him he is so attractive because of his personality, but I know that would be totally inappropriate. I wish I had a close enough relationship with him to just say that.

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  • Just spend more time around him, in school and out. The more you're with him, the easier it will be to talk with him, and for him to talk with you. Eventually, the heat and energy between the two of you will begin to be evident and you will become irresistible to him, just like he is to you now. Without telling him that you're speaking about him directly, leave him with the impression that you don't consider your marriage an impediment to romance or true love. Don't make yourself sound like a s***, but just let him understand that you have interests that your husband either doesn't share or doesn't stimulate: he'll get the message. Finally, find something he likes, and make yourself an expert on that thing, whatever it is. People -- men in particular -- love to talk about themselves and the things they like: let him talk. You'll be hooking it with him before you know it. Good luck!!

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