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I tried
I tried killing myself on Sunday night but failed, I managed to ** my way out of it and everyone thinks I had an accident. It was pretty serious and everyone can't understand how it happened. It's made me even more distant and I don't feel a connection with anyone anymore, I hate feeling this way but I can't help it.
I know this is an old post but if you're still reading this, or if anybody else is feeling this way, the only thing I can offer (and. hopefully it helps) is that most people who have survived an attempt said that one of there last thoughts had been, I wish I hadn't jumped (or whatever the method) and ultimately good things happened in their lives. So hang in there and try to see all the good things every time you're feeling bad. It can be as simple as the sun rising, or a bird singing, or a joke you heard, or watching children playing carefree games, or an older couple strolling through a park holding hands.
To the comment that said about people not seeking help. It's hard, especially when you're in that situation. I mean who can you trust?? I don't know anyone I can trust enough to tell and even if I did would they be understanding?? They might think we're dramatising it... So no it's not that easy to seek help.
The problem with people who want to die is that your not happy but you don't seek help I don't understand why you think people can read your mind if you can not be honest with them and say I am hurting because ....
Then if you do die everyone will say he / she was so happy why did they kill themselves .
Do you understand what I am saying ?
Go get help there is help out there , see a doctor and stop laying to yourself and others and pretending everything is fine !
This is your life you only get one chance so make the best of it .
He Listen I've been down that dark road too please there's always another way I've always felt distant from almost everybody in my life and I still have almost no one to talk to. But you have to press on you will one day be happy I promise I like you had a lot of reasons for wanting to end it all in my case my abusive stepfather, and alienation from people altogether I've attempted suicide but just couldn't do it and after all this I've found happiness against all the odds you need to just keep the candle light of hope from extinguishing in the dark cold tunnel of fear, depression, anger, and cruelty. Please for Me Go on with your life