Other woman

I think I may have fallen for my wife's friend (who is also married). Without getting too much into detail, we have been flirting and have gotten close (non-sexual) over the past 1.5 years. The other day, I emailed her a 'hypothetical' situation where a friend I know has feelings for a married woman, etc. etc. It wasn't blatantly obvious that I was referring to our situation but she should have got the hint. Anyways, she emailed me a pretty long email about how she was the other woman when she got married and the dangers, etc. of what happens, all stuff I didn't know about her before. I replied with a very thoughtful, gushy email about how I'm glad she trusted me, etc. and I honestly thought this would push our relationship into another direction. Her response to my gushy email was very short two sentence email along the lines of "don't feel bad, my life isn't so bad!" I was taken back and basically have come to the conclusion that she doesn't wan't to pursue anything. In a way, I am a little heartbroken and don't know what to do now.

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  • I think that she probably got the hint. Maybe she even has feelings for you. But she obviously doesn't want to pursue anything. And she's right, you're both married, and cheating always has consequences. Try to distance yourself from her, and spend more time with your wife. I hope everything turns out ok.

  • Emailing her at all is completely inappropriate. She is married, you are married. Drop it!

  • Don't be a dumb ass and ruin everything. If you're not happy in your marriage be a man and tell your wife, don't cheat on her.

  • I'm so sorry to hear that she failed to open the door to a relationship with you, and I totally understand why that would leave you with some heartache, but I think you read her correctly: if that was something she wanted, the recent series of emails certainly presented the opportunity for her to allow it to start. That isn't to say that it will NEVER happen, only that she seems unprepared for it to begin NOW. Having said all that, my recommendation is to stay in contact with her and remain her secret friend (and her friend who keeps her secrets): that status could EASILY lead to something warmer and sexier. Email her periodically(assuming her account is protected and inaccessible, and ALWAYS ask if that's the case), take every opportunity to be in her presence (parties, meetings, hobbies, etc.), and every time you see her, let her know how good that is, and how good she looks. These things don't always happen like in soap operas and p*** movies: they usually take time. So.....take the time.

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