Hurting and Confused

I married a great guy my first boyfriend who i liked since i was 16 we were friends dated at 18 and ended up getting married at 21. I thought i was in love and we developed something very deep. i am now 23 and i love my husband to death.

Then i started to talk to this other guy, i treat all my guy friends like friends nothing more. I dont cheat. I am a gamer so i make guy friends a lot. Problem is i started to develop feelings for this friends because he loves me. Even though he knew i was taken. Problem is I have developed strong feelings for this other guy.

I thought i knew what love was until i met this new guy i believe my feelings to be stronger with this guy then my own husband. I feel so bad and im hurting. I have not cheated but this new guy knows how i feel about him, and knows i cant be with him.

Im not sure if im doing the right or wrong thing. But i love them both. And im confused so, and hurting so much for this guy. We want to be friends but problem is we care for each other so much we know we need to stop these feelings. IT HURTS SO MUCH. Im getting depressed knowing hes trying to not love me and i care for him so much. I LOVE MY HUSBAND but i believe i never truly loved my husband. And i cant break it off with him because i feel like a huge betrayal. I will be loyal but i feel like im sacrificing my happiness. But in the same time i feel its worth it so my husband can be happy. But im hurting. Do you think what im doing is right or wrong? Please help me. And nothing rude because i am so confused.


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  • You ask if you're doing the right or wrong thing. If your husband was doing the same thing you are doing, how would you feel? That may lead you to your answer. You are already deep into an emotional affair. You're cheating. You can't get around it. I get the feeling from your post that maybe you haven't actually met this guy in person? Is that right? Have you skyped with him? Is he actually who he says he is? Look it's not fair to your husband..he married you. The relationship is between you and he, not you, he and some other guy. Unless he's into that. You're going to have to make some decision about what you want. It may be that you just married too young. From 16 - 23 there is a lot of developmental growth that goes on. So maybe it worked for you two when you were younger, but you're obviously needing something that he's not giving to you. So you've gone outside your marriage to get it..It sounds more like a emotional connection that you're missing in your marriage, rather than anything physical. Just be really careful what you decide. You could tell your husband what's going on.. chances are he may not be an option to go back to. Which is understandable. If you leave, you may want to just take some time for yourself and figure out who you are on your own. Because you don't really know who you are. Because leaving a marriage for some guy you met through some gaming site well the fantasy may be a whole lot better than reality. Talking with someone may help you figure it out.

  • You're an awful person. You don't deserve your husband and I hope he's cheating on you. Waaaah I'm unhappy because I don't know how to stay faithful to someone. And developing feelings for another is being unfaithful. Still talking to someone you're "in love" with is unfaithful. Obviously he wasted his time with you because you're still a little girl. I hope your husband leaves you and you hookup with the other guy and get aids.

  • For a guy one of the worst feelings in the world!!, is finding out your gf or wife has been with another guy or that another guy or man has had her and she's done sexual things with him or for him. It makes the guy feel sooooooooooooooo stupid after he finds out and just stupid and dumb and like he's nothing and that the other guy is better and then you have all the images in your head and wonder things like what you guys said and so much other stuff. So I would say never ever cheat because THAT! WOULD BE TRUE BETRAYAL, and a betrayal or feeling that the guy would never forget or get over. People in general always remember how other people made them feel good or bad and contrary to what people try to say, time does not make things better when cheating happens, usually the person who gets cheated on just learns to find ways to temporarily forget what happened but its always there. If you want to be happy and your husband truly loves you he will want you to be happy even if its not with him. My suggestion is to talk to your husband about this just like you wrote it out here, exactly like you did and no holding back or sugar coating it. Then go be happy and if it doesn't work out at least when you come back to your husband you will have him knowing that you are honest as a person.

  • Tell hubby u want two husbands or a hubby and lover.It sounds stupid but it happens around the world. Best of luck

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