Obsessed with my ex
I am almost 22 and obsessed with my ex girlfriend. We started dating when we were 19 and broke up a few months ago. She left me and asked if we could still f*** and be best friends even outside of a relationship. Since i wanted her back badly i agreed which i shouldnt have. The first time we had s** i wasnt expecting it at all and it felt so incredible. The 2nd time she started crying during and so we stopped having s** and she told me we can only be friends. Then she went on a date with another guy after that and then we couldnt go to this Hello Kitty Con thing i really wanted to take her too because nobody gave a f*** about her enough to take her on time so she could get a tattoo the only reason she wanted to go, and she told me not to take her because i was crazy mad at her for going on a date and making out with another guy. Anyway after that she started dating him for real and the worst part is shes incredibley happy now, she told me she was unhapy in our relationship (even tho we had talked about marriage) she never introduced me to her father or any of her family but after maybe a few weeks of dating this 30 something year old loser she already introduced him to her family. All the time i try to get her to come back to me but shes much happier w/o me. everyday i wish i was dead because im so in love with someone who tricked me so badly and will never love me again. Everyday i imagine her sucking his c*** and f****** him and how the woman I loved who we both shared our first sexual experiences with and built a loving relationship for over 2 years which was to lead to marriage just leaves me out of the bue because she "wasnt happy with me." Im sure i sound like a complete p**** but i was actually a great boyfriend I treated her better than anyone else in her life loved her to death got her so many gifts I even had to live in a different city than her for 6 months but I guess it wasnt enough. I really just wish I was dead, my life feels so pointless empty and unfilfilled.