Compulsive liar..extreme guilt

I am an extreme attention seeker. i abuse the trust of the people i love. i have lied to my girlfriend and told her that i have been sexually abused as a child/raped recently. I KNOW HOW BAD THIS IS. she has been so supportive and loving it makes me feel worse everyday. i mean i genuinely loathe myself for this.
i don't know why i do it, and coming clean isn't really an option for me as it's been so long. what's wrong with me. i am not going to lie again because i know how bad the guilt is, but how am i supposed to live with myself?

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