3 Year Afair

I'm a mother of 3. My youngest is 19months old. I have been having an affair with my best friend for the lats 3years and he is the father of my youngest child. We have been planing to end the relations ships with our current "partners" for 2 years but it always seems that he has another reason to stay with his wife. First it was an operation she needed. Then their oldest sons birthday now its her can accident. Lately it seems like he doesn't want to go further with the relationship but the s** and the fact that we have a child together is what's keeping him with me, also the fact that I make certain fantasies come true that most woman would never even let their men dream of. Now I'm wondering what I should do...should I just end it even though I know it will break my heart completely or should I keep on hoping and believing his promises? He also placed an online ad to get woman to "s** chat" with him and when I confronted him he lied and said he doesn't know anything but later told me the truth, he said it didn't mean a thing but still he chatted to some of the girls and again lied to me about it. I feel like he will always be a cheater. I know I am to however I am truly in love with him and has never cheated on him. My hb and I have not had s** more then a year before I started seeing my lover and we only started having s** again a few days after I found out I was pregnant sins the baby's birth we haven't had s**. My hb is amazing with the kids but he doesn't make me happy and I don't love him.


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  • Avoid Immoral Women
    1My son, pay attention to my wisdom;
    listen carefully to my wise counsel.
    2Then you will show discernment,
    and your lips will express what you’ve learned.
    3For the lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey,
    and her mouth is smoother than oil.
    4But in the end she is as bitter as poison,
    as dangerous as a double-edged sword.
    5Her feet go down to death;
    her steps lead straight to the grave.
    6For she cares nothing about the path to life.
    She staggers down a crooked trail and doesn’t realize it.
    7So now, my sons, listen to me.
    Never stray from what I am about to say:
    8Stay away from her!
    Don’t go near the door of her house!
    9If you do, you will lose your honor
    and will lose to merciless people all you have achieved.
    10Strangers will consume your wealth,
    and someone else will enjoy the fruit of your labor.
    11In the end you will groan in anguish
    when disease consumes your body.
    12You will say, “How I hated discipline!
    If only I had not ignored all the warnings!
    13Oh, why didn’t I listen to my teachers?
    Why didn’t I pay attention to my instructors?
    14I have come to the brink of utter ruin,
    and now I must face public disgrace.”
    15Drink water from your own well—
    share your love only with your wife.
    16Why spill the water of your springs in the streets,
    having s** with just anyone?
    17You should reserve it for yourselves.
    Never share it with strangers.
    18Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
    Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
    19She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.
    Let her b****** satisfy you always.
    May you always be captivated by her love.
    20Why be captivated, my son, by an immoral woman,
    or fondle the b****** of a promiscuous woman?
    21For the lord sees clearly what a man does,
    examining every path he takes.
    22An evil man is held captive by his own sins;
    they are ropes that catch and hold him.
    23He will die for lack of self-control;
    he will be lost because of his great foolishness.

  • Love is weird. You are being used for s**. Live with it or move on. I'm a mom of a toddler and having an affair with another mom that i met at playgroup. Neither of us wish to leave our husbands but this illicit relationship i guess fills a void. Also within the relationship she in a way abuses me. She engages in some bdsm stuff. She spanks me and I mean hard. If my husband even suggested that I would totally frezze him out yet i let her. So I am conflicted with guilt and some confusion.

  • The writing is on the wall, you're just slowly getting the message. He is only using you for s**. If he was serious about leaving his wife, he would have. And he is contacting women on s** chat lines or whatever it is. Not even you having a child is making him leave his wife. You know he will never be satisfied, with you, his wife or anyone else he cheats with. This issue with his own insecurities. You have created an illusion of who you think he is, but his actions speak louder than his words. If you are not happy at home..you need to deal with you and your marriage and move on from this. A marriage takes two people, you cannot blame all the problems on your husband, you must take responsibility for your actions as well. You may be alone for awhile, but it would probably be far better than being in a loveless marriage or with a cheater. Because right now those are your choices. You have children, you have a responsibility to show them what a strong relationship is. Cut ties now with your lover. Yes, you have a child with him but there are no guarantees if that becomes public knowledge that he'll leave his wife and/or stay with you or even be faithful to you. Faithful..lol. That's actually laughable. You know you can never expect that. Your relationship is built on lies. And maybe it's not about your husband or some man making you happy. Maybe it's you figuring out why you're not happy with yourself.

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