I hate my siblings

I am third in a brood of five. We grew up together and try to get together regularly after our marriages but I really do not feel any deep bond with any of them. They share secrets, gossips and any little stories of their lives. Not that I'm truly interested about them.

But when my parents give a favor or praises to them or their kids, I feel fiercely jealous. I often wished I was an only child. I still do.

I get paranoid that should my parents be not here anymore, they take control of family decisions. I always felt left out on these with my parents still around. They always take my opinions and wishes lightly or dismissively.

They are all well off than me. Maybe that's why. Or maybe because they know that I am selfish and conceited. Either way, they do not take me seriously and "siblingly".

If only I have so much many, they won't matter so much to me. I think. But it's true that who has money has power.

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