My Speech and Writing

Everything I do as far as writing and speech goes, I always sound extremely egotistical and narcissist, especially when explaining why I think I'm write. I hardly ever put any emotion into my speech/writing unless its an apology or something of emotional matter because I feel as if it gets in the way true understanding and positive/constructive arguing. I think people don't want to be wrong because it emotionally hurts, which I understand very well, but when you overcome the pain you realize that your emotions held you back against something you needed to learn. I don't know what to do when I literally only have two real friends that ever actually care and understand my position. My self-esteem has hit really low lately because when I look at all of my "friends" I remember most of them are fake or meaningless and I'm actually quite alone. There's nothing really wrong with them, it's just the never try to get to know the real me and that discounts them as a friend. All my friends that don't understand my way of using English all accuse me of hating people, being unloving, uncaring, narcissist, egotistical, and simply non-human. My feelings are usually hurt and I have to pretend everything is ok because only two people can I really trust my feelings two. Small note: My family just exists to me, no huge emotional attachment.

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