chronicle of my 19th.
going to say goodbye to my 10 something, so wanna write down my kinda outrageous 19th.
i grow up in a conservative country. studied in a catholic girl school.
but yup, i'm a s***.
i've masaturbated since i was 13. but hey, i was able to abstain and maintain a goody-goody girl image thru and thru till i'm in college, i.e. when i'm 19. everyone around me thinks that i deserve a boyfriend. they think that i'm smart, beautiful and have a nice personality. (am sorry if i sound boastful) yes, i always want and think i deserve something new hit in my life, love? not exactly, it's s**! (i blame my 13-year-girl-only-schooling messed up my hormone :P) so once i'm in college, i started living out the real me.
my 19th seems revolved around partying and clubbing.
so in my 19th, i
-dated a guy there who gave me usd200 for taxi each time (when i only need usd15..). he invited me home on our 3rd date, i turned him down. to be honest, i regreted it so much now!
-nearly tried my first one night stand and understood the power of beer goggle! thanks god i ran away after he went down for me. (i regained my conscious, discovered how he looks, get dressed and ran away at light speed)
-lose my virginity to my perfect-f***-buddy. he looks decent and rich. he waited for 2 months till i was ready. i love how things went everytime we met. we made out, striped all the way to his room. we had a nice chat everytime after our 'main course'. unfortuately he moved away but we remain friends, still kept in contact. am hoping he's still here.
(during my last month trip)
-went to ibiza for my first time. topless at beach first time. being fingered on the dance floor first time.
-almost did it with the hot guy sitting next to me during night train.
-lastly, able to abstain throughout my trip!
-had my first real one night stand. (yes, i too miss being f***** by a real d***) but turned out that guy's memeber is too large for me. no fun at all. light bleeding afterwards.
-bought a home pregnancy test. negative.*sigh with relief*
i always wanna have s** but i'm not promiscuous, after all, i only had 4 full on s** though there were way more occasions i could have it. i didn't waste all my time on partying, i did very well in college. i'm still happy with my family and friends, my close friends know about it and my family (except dad) have a little clue about it, they all have no problem with it as long as i play safe and am not hurting anyone and myself.
so i'm going to be 20, though i'm fine with my lifestyle, i still wanna change it a bit to cope with social norm.
i'm here now, vowing that i'm not going to have any one nighter after my 20th b-day! (i'll also try flirt less too!)
see if i can do it! wish me luck.
am so drunk. goodbye.