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I Don't Know Why I Self Harm
I am thirteen. Nothing has ever gone hortibly wrong in my life. I get stressed sometimes, but that's it. I started self harming three years ago, but I can't say that's when it happened, more like the thoughtvwas implanted. When I was five I hit myself with things, not even knowing what I was doing. When I was ten, I decided yo hit myselfvwith a ruler hard, and eventually I started cutting, but I don't know why. I even attempted suicide, but there is no reason behind this. I haven't told mybparents and I needed to say something. Thanks for letting me share some of my thoughts.
When i started puberty before 13,i started bedwetting because of it! My parents got me cloth pin on diapers and rubberpants[plastic pants] to wear to bed every night and i felt like a baby! Before bed time,mom allways put the diapers and rubberpants on me which made me feel even more like a baby. The only good part was my friends accepted me and when they would sleep over,they would also wear my diapers and rubberpants so i wouldn't be the odd girl out.I wore the diapers and rubberpants all thru 13,14 and partly into 15 and it was hard!
Sometimes it's hard to figure out the reasons for hurting yourself when nothing typically labelled as traumatic has happened. But sometimes you get so used to repressing stuff-for whatever reason-that when things get to be hard, you don't know how to express it. Or you think that you shouldn't express it to other people.