Regret and resentment.

I confess that, although I am generally a silver-lining sort of person, there are days I struggle to cope.

I don't know how to tell my other half that they need to get their emotional s*** together. I live them, but it feels insensitive to say anything other than gentle nudges in one direction or another.

Meanwhile, a therapist two years ago told me that it might come down to having to make some difficult choices to take care of myself. I don't know that I could or would ever place myself above others, and yet in some ways I have, by how busy I keep myself.

I feel guilty constantly for wanting to do anything away from my other half, and similarly hate spending every evening each week sitting on the couch, where the other person can escape from the trappings of the mundane and can step outside their own existence for a bit.

I don't know what to do. I have so many things I'd rather be doing. They're super depressed (and depressing, at that) and don't want to mediate.

Meanwhile, I bury myself in my work to escape. What happens if/when they decide enough is enough, and leave? I don't want to lose my best friend.

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1 Comment

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  • I feel for you.

    I love my wife. I feel guilty if I go and do anything without her. I would love to do things WITH her. I end up tagging along with her. Just to be with her.

    She is busy as and seems to feel no such guilt. She rarely gets involved in things I instigate.

    I think she sees me as needy and dependant. I am certainly depressed - hence why I seek out this sort of web site. I think one day she will just up and leave. She did that once before. I feel totally disempowered.

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