My bi polar WIfe

My wife is bipolar.. and as much as I love her.. I hate her too. She cheats on me, she lies, she steals money and has done a great deal to ruin my life. I want to be rid of her in the worst way possible. I cant take the lying and cheating anymore. I am keeping up appearances for a few more years until our kids become adults, as she will not get or want custody, and she wont pay child support.

I feel like I would have been better off if I had tossed her out ten yrs ago, when she first cheated on me. I know she will be a mess without me but I am a mess now. What have I done to merit having her steal 20 plus years of my life?

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  • I am bi-polar myself. I agree with the majority of comments concerning medication. I used to heavily use alcohol and drugs to self-medicate my problems. It was only after I got sober and stayed sober for a long period of time that I was eventually diagnosed with bi-polar disorder.

    The reason that I sought extra help for my condition was because my illness began to interfere with my job and social life. My boss called me into his office one day and expressed the concerns of the entire office staff who noticed that I seem to go from a really nice guy who makes people laugh and has a lot of enthusiasm and energy to an extremely depressed individual who cares about nothing and no one. It is hard to explain to someone who does not have a mental illness. It is frustrating and freightening as well.

    Again, I would seek medication for her. She is apparently ill from what you have confessed. If you need to you can call an ambulance for her and have her taken away to be treated. It is very traumatic to have this done, but in the end it might save her life and salvage your marriage.

    I am currently taking a medication called Depakote. It helps incredibly. I should also mention that medication alone will not solve the problems with your wife. She should go to a therapist as well. I do this myself and the combination of meds and therapy has made my life far more managable.

    Best of luck, my friend.

  • Bill, she's just suffered through a tough campaign. Try to be a bit supportive.

  • Ask Sybil there if you can s**** one of her other personalities!

  • I totally understand, I am in similar situation. It is tragic. Be patient and don't feel sorry for her when the time comes to leave. If you want write to me at KitweBoys1975 at yahoo.gr

  • She needs medication just like most everyone else is saying. Everything you are describing are classic Manic traits; I know because I am BiPolar 2 and I used to be there except I never cheated on anyone. Just because these are classic Manic traits does not give excuse to her behavior and to her treatment of you and the children. If she has meds and does not take them then she doesn't really desire a "normal" life and in actuality allot of BiPolar Patients stop taking thier meds because they like the high or manic episodes. If she has meds, she needs to be honest with her doctor that they are not working, she needs her blood levels checked to see if she is getting the right amount of meds in her system and she also may need to be put on different meds because obviously whatever she is on is not working.
    Honestly I don't think you should wait 2 more years like you said, so what if her life will be a mess without you. She has to grow up and deal with her own disease and take care of herself and her life on her own for her to look at herself because all you are right now is codependant and your letting her treat you like s*** and s******* up your life. You've already lost so much of yourself, take care of you now. Her disease is controling her without proper care, don't let her disease control you too.

  • See if you can just get rid of the polar part. Keeping her bi opens up more possibilities.

  • I feel so bad for you, you sound like a really good guy. I can relate truly and know of someone in your exact situation, if you absolutley can't deal with her don't kill her or anything crazy like that because there will go the rest of your life and your children's future as well. Have you considered finding someone to confide in like a woman understanding and compassionate enough to listen and be by your side to hold you up through this? I'm not saying cheat but do find a friend. I am here to talk if you care to.

  • ^^f*** you you selfish b****. grow b**** and leave NOW

  • Although my husband isn't bi-polar (that I know of anyway), I can relate. I do not love him anymore, but feel as though I cannot leave for a few more years until our kids are grown. It's very hard to live a lie like this, so I can understand how you feel.

  • MEDICATION FOOL!

  • Sack up and get a divorce lawyer.

  • not all bipolars steal or cheat on their partners. she needs meds. it's her responsibility to take them. bipolars can get pretty wacky but some of them milk it to cover every s***** thing they do.bipolar does not mean poor character. They range from rotten j*** to wonderful human being just like everyone else.

  • Is she medicated? If she is and those things are still happening, she either doesn't have the right medication or the right dosing. This impulsive nature is a symptom and can be very hard to control if the disorder isn't managed. If you have no hope in her or your marriage, your plan seems good.

    What did you do to lose this many years?

    Simple: you loved her.

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