Regret of parenthood

I have one child and I hate having her around. My mother never played with me or taught me anything so I have no idea what to do. the pregnancy was a f****** mistake. I'm a lesbian and I just wanted to make sure I didn't like guys. my family had been telling me I was gonna burn in h*** since I was 9 and it led me to make the idiotic decision of sleeping with a guy even though I find them f****** disgusting. I saved money for an abortion but was a few dollars short. my mother promised to lend me the money and then bailed on me at the last minute... said I'd thank her for it. 9 years later and all I wanna do is go to her house and kill her. got tricked into going to a for profit college and I'm over $30,000 in debt. The irs takes my income tax so I can never save for anything. my mother is an abusive Jesus freak and would turn my daughter into a self-hating African because she grew up in the time of segregation and still wishes she was f****** white. she tells my daughter her hair is bad unless it's straight. My wife is another child I have to raise. her and my daughter are constantly fighting,and putting me in the middle. I can't work a decent set of hours because I have no one to watch my child. A****** drives wrecked my car on the interstate so I have no personal transportation in a city where you have to f****** speak Spanish for every g****** job while simultaneously looking like Taylor Swift to get hired. I hate talking to my daughter because she's always f****** lying or repeating the same Bullshit 10 to 15 times in a row like no one heard it the first f****** time. I'm on f****** foodstamps which I F****** Hate! my in laws barely speak any f****** English, so hanging out with them is a real f****** annoyance. I have no family because my mother made sure to keep me away from everyone and it seems all the people my age in this city are criminals, whores, or addicts. I sometimes wish we would get in a car accident and my daughter would die so I can start over in life or drive myself to suicide with grief. adoption is definitely out because I couldn't handle it of she was raped in foster care or by her "new family" and I don't want to answer the why did you give me away questions. I just want her f****** gone.


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  • Wow... *sigh* I'm rooting for you. What a s***-sandwich! Post an update if things get any better for you. I really hope they do somehow.

  • Yeah religious people telling a 9 year old they're going to h*** what great morals!

  • U need help ur very f***** up

  • Sound like u jus need a c*** in ur lilcunt is what u need

  • You love your daughter - your life is just extremely hard right now. People are struggling everywhere; try to remember, you could always have it worse, you don't live in Iraq.

  • I agree with this poster. It sounds like you had a hard life and are continuing the have a hard life. It's okay to be upset that life isn't what you would like it to be, everyone has regrets, but PLEASE do not take it out on your daughter. You are only continuing the cycle your mother started. Your daughter did not ask to be born. Despite you being homosexual you engaged in a heterosexual act and she is the creation of that. That was your choice not hers. It would be great if you all could go to counselling. It sounds like there are a lot of unresolved issues in your past and your current situation festering. FYI I am African and I say natural hair is beautiful. Do not listen to your mother and her slave mentality. Let your daughter stay natural. Be blessed and I hope your situation gets better.

  • Boy,you really do have issues!!

  • Maybe you can get someone to adopt your little girl. The child deserves better than you for a parent.

  • Maybe you can jump off the nearest cliff.

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