One and Done!

I'm so happy I only had one kid. I stuck to my guns, much to the pressure of friends and family, and knew I would never take on this much responsibility ever again. No f****** way! No support, no help, depressed, close to suicide so many times. I look back and know the only reason I survived was because I had a job to do.

My kid will be moving out soon, and I'm finally beginning to feel free again. Like me again. My depression is slowly disappearing. I'm less stressed, my nerves are less frazzled, my back pain has gone, I worry less and I'm sleeping better. Back to being a comatose sleeper. Because once you become a parent say goodbye to your sanity, surviving on little to no sleep. That lasts all the way up until you're kid is grown enough. It's a natural instinct. It's the come down. The exhale.

But when they fly, you can fly. Hold on in there.

Dec 29, 2016

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  • OAD rocks!!! I have all the joy and none of the sibling rivalry and crap that my friends have! Why would anyone even want more than one?

  • My mother had the solution to all of your problems and you all sound like you should have practiced it. If you don't want children keep your damn legs crossed. There are so many ways to prevent pregnancy none of you had to have kids. What kind of bubble did you grow up in that you had no idea it was going to be hard work and a lot of responsibility raising a child? You are charged with taking care of a helpless being until they can provide for themselves of course its going to be a lot of work! You are supposed to be ready to except that concept before you bring a new life into the world, its called maturity. Just because you have the ability to have children doesn't mean you have to use that ability .

  • If you don't want a child, you can keep your legs open and still be protected, using necessary precautions against pregnancy and STI's. A woman doesn't have to remain abstinent or a virgin, in fear of getting pregnant. However, it depends on where the girl/woman resides. In some Countries, religions and culture's, a female has no rights/choices, in regards to their bodies.

  • I'm pretty sure you missed the very next sentence where the poster said there were many ways to prevent pregnancy . No one is saying woman have to stay virgins or practice abstinence ,but if you aren't ready to be a parent protect yourself from getting pregnant. If he won't wear a condom don't have s** with him. Its not that hard of a concept.

  • True x

  • Reading these comments about " oh if I only knew it was so much work" are you people for real? You are bringing a new life into the world and you just think its going to be a breeze? Its called being a grown up and having responsibilities. Perhaps if your were more involved parents you would have found more joy in raising your children. The selfishness is unreal! To the woman who had three children , you didn't realize it was a lot of responsibility after the first or even the second one? You couldn't have just chose not to have anymore after the first child? Its so sad you could conceive so easily while other women who would welcome a child with loving arms are unable to.

  • As long as she loves those three children, provides and stands to face her responsibilities, she can write what she likes. Tired of hearing people use the 'so many people can't have children' excuse. Only works when children are unwanted, abused etc. What I see clearly here are good parents, working hard and doing a great job. That is why it's tough. Yes. When you're actually doing a good job, it's a great deal of responsibility and extremely hard work. In my opinion, the rubbish parents are the ones finding it a breeze! Food for nutritious thought.

  • Well said! :-)

  • I truly find this post disturbing and just going off of what was written here I feel sorry for your child. Being a parent should fill your life with joy , yes there are stressful times and you worry about them but you get through it. You sound so selfish , like it was some sort of punishment having to raise a child you created. Just the fact you refer to your child as "kid" over and over to me shows a lack of love in your heart. I'm glad you only had one child also!

  • Who says their children don't fill their lives with joy? Oh right because they haven't written it here, while venting about the tough parts make them such 'tewwible, tewwible pawents', right?! Grow up!! It isn't your life. Let them vent. And if you have 'kids' go be a good parent but remember just for consistency's sake, don't you ever, ever complain.

  • Lol I agree x

  • Yeah, once you become a parent you can't go back. I Intentionally stopped at one as well. My daughter is an adult now, and I love her and I'm proud of her, but parenthood wasn't a joy for me. I was a good mother I think, but it was just a role I played 24/7, it wasn't the real me. Exhausting to constantly fake it. Some people just aren't suited to it, and I'm one of them.

  • You all sound like a bunch of selfish t*** waffles... Somebody should have punched you in the ovaries to prevent any of you from conceiving long ago... Yup, straight shot to the baby maker.

  • Giving birth to a child is a selfless act, within itself. To carry a child inside your body, then give birth, is a miracle.

    However, the circumstances which led to a female becoming pregnant, may and does differ each female.

    Some intentions are probably selfish, some probably conceived due to being raped and so forth. Every mother has a story.

    Just remember that!

  • Guess what. You don't know until you know. Bless you for being a good parent robot. But some of us don't know we can't do the regular zombie parent duty routine without our skin hurting

  • Got three, wished I could go back to one. Love my three for real. But it's shitloads of work and responsibility

  • Yes I totally understand this! I love my kid with all my heart and feel such pride seeing a fully grown, responsibly being about to go out and take on the world, but to be a parent is definitely a tonne of responsibility. Way too much to go through again for me I'm afraid.

  • This post is so inspirational. I'm 28 with three kids, and I swear I cannot wait until the strife is finally over. Raising kids is an ordeal.

  • I'm 32 and been in a committed relationship, for eight years.
    My partner and I love children, but don't intend to have any. We don't feel the need and urge to. We believe our life is complete already, full of unconditional love.

    My mother consistently, tries to persuade me otherwise. But what she doesn't realise is, witnessing her struggle with four children, whilst having a career and minimal support from close social networks, when I was a child, partially influenced my choice not to have children. It wasn't the primary reason, but it definitely influenced my decision.

    My mother has always been, my role model.
    She struggled without complaints, whilst nurturing my siblings and I. She was our father and mother, because my father was a useless lout. I'm truly grateful to have a mother like her, within my life. I'm aware some people are, less fortunate.

    My mother is now enjoying her single life and retirement. She participates in numerous hobbies and activities, of which she couldn't do, when rearing up her children. Yes, it was my mother's choice to have four children. But she never once complained about it. However, that was and is my mother, she never complains about anything, even if she was feeling the strain and so forth. She's a testament and embodiment, to female empowerment.

    To all the dedicated, loving and striving parents out there, respect and one love.
    I believe being a good parent, is one of the hardest responsibilities, in this world.
    I'm not a parent myself, but witnessing and experiencing what my mother went through, made me realise it. She did it with dignity, love, humbleness and consistency.

    Respect and love ❤

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