I NEED SOME ADCIVE??!?!?!!
IM 22 yrs old. Both of my parents passed away I'm a tragic car accident when I was 15. They both had degrees and left me good wills me being only child I got left alone with my nanny and house servants. I finished school and got a chance to go to college not anuniversity as they wished. I got my associates and landed a job. Now that I've worked nearly every day sometimes I get depressed and kiss them terribly I wish they were here to see me and hug me or tell me how much they love me. The servants had to be let go since the house is always alone and I'm always working who needs a mansion to be cleaned daily. I do my cooking alone so my nana is the only one who lives with me. Majority of both my parents families live out of state and never where close to my parents, mainly becuase both my parents come from wealth everonenalways seen us different. When my parents passed away I went through a huge 4 year depression. I'd never want to eat never go out never talked to people. Nobody ever gave me advice I had to get up alone and manage to keep going on with life alone. I haven't had plans of marriage any time soon, intentionally because my family left a ton of fortune and properties businesses behind I wouldn't want to find a "gold digger" so I came to the conclusion to act normal not drive a expensive car dress formal, and so I've done eat at normal restaraunts not over spend. My parents were the typical wealthy kind to want me to dress full suit and tie type. Over the course I've become depressed now more because I went to school and found a decent job paying 100k a year that I have no necessity for. If I wanted to I could quit today and still live off of my family bussinesss and real estate investments for ever but I want to meet somenone to share my adventures with someone who just won't fall in love for my money. But idk where to start I've come across tons of beautiful woman I just can't talk to them because I'd feel they'd think of me as this normal kid who went to college then they'd find out both y parents own multi billion dollar businesses and they'd think I'm a dush bag for lying what do I do? I'm excited to say I've saved up from my money and hard work 50k and I bought my first truck lol. Nana thinks I'm crazy but it's the experiences I love . I know where hard work comes from I want to share my life money & adventures with someone in December I'll be 23 and if I don't do it know I never will. I'm not happy sometimes I wish I was average and normal meaning worked every day had a wife and kids at an average house I'd still pay day to day go to cookouts etc. in my parents will they didn't want me to sell the house so I don't plan to. But I have zero friends zero social life and zero love. Am I supposed to say hey I'm rich and I'm lonely be my friend?? Plus what kind of friends am I supposed to have is it okay to have any friend I want is there rules I have to follow? What about a woman can I fall in love with any woman and tell her move into my will mansion with me, she'd be creeped out. Sharing my story hurts until this day. Depression slowly gets to me daily the only thing keeping me distracted is my normal job and my 12 hour shifts when I make it home in the gated community and I lay there it hits me again, I seek for answers I can't find. At nights it quiet. Dark. And empty. My parents room stays closed because until this day it hurts me so much . The pain is unbearable! I wish I had some of my oyncles or cousins near by but over time we lost touch. This is what being alone feels like I don't want to live this way. Sometimes out of crazy thoughts I feel like getting up and adopting twins both boys but I re think and say that's crazy! I love kids especially boys the thought of having them walking around running around or me waking up to take them to school and the birthday parties, commuting with their friends parents. That's the life I want & other time I let depression kill me inside. Silence is my best friend. I need a miracle. I don't want to be alone forever.