Depression and suicide
I know this may seem like an exaggeration, but this how I genuinely feel.
TL:DR I've been dealing with a lot of s***, I hate everyone, and I feel like everyone hates me. I have no friends with me, and I can't talk to anyone, as I don't mix well with them. I feel like i'm destined to fail and everything and everyone is against me, and to me, life is just full s*** and not worth living anymore.
For over a year I've been dealing with depression, anxiety, and loneliness. I don't trust anyone, I barely leave my room, and it's gotten so bad up to the point where it's been affecting me physiologically.
And now I just feel like dying.
And I honestly just want all this s*** to end, so i've been thinking about death, and the peace it will bring, however I fear killing myself, as I fear pain, I know it's cowardly, but I just want to sleep forever and let all the s*** disappear.
In the past I would fear the thought of death or something similar to death, but now, the thought of death wouldn't even faze me, my depression, anxiety, and loneliness has eaten so much of me, up to the point that if death came, I would happily accept it.
I know compared to others' my pain may seem like nothing, but it hurts so much for me.
Though I plan on living a little longer, I honestly do not see any point in living and enduring any all this s*** anymore.
And if things aren't changing for the better, i'm just gonna resort to suicide.