I've battled depression for years. I'm the one that posted a while ago saying I can't stop thinking of my ex boyfriends even thought I'm in a happy relationship with 3 kids.
I'm always up all night. I never sleep.
It finally hit me just now. The bottom line for my depression and my desire to die. It sounds stupid but... I just want to mean something. To somebody.
I only see my family a couple of times a year. My boyfriend works long hours so he comes home, eats and goes to bed.
The weekends when he's home, hes on his computer with his friends.
My eldest two kids are teenagers and barely say two words to me. My youngest is only 2 and isn't company.
My only friend only talks to me when her other friends are busy.
I'm alone. I've been alone for 15 years.
I'm not exaggerating when I say that nobody cares about me.
If I died, nobody would notice till dinner was late.
Nobody gives a s***.
I sit crying almost every night on my own in the dark with s*** on tv just wishing someone would notice me.
Sounds selfish I know.
I just want someone to care. Anybody