I Can't Stop Lying
I'm a compulsive liar. I've been lying to people ever since I was in grade school. At first it was to make friends, and then the lies got deeper. But I couldn't stop lying. It got to the point to where my lies were spreading around the school. I became the most popular kid overnight, but I had no proof to back up any of my accusations.
Eventually people wanted proof. So I convinced my parents to move me to another school. I told my friends that I was going to Hollywood to make it big. Considering all of my previous lies, and the fact I was moving, it wasn't hard for them to believe. I soon realized that my lie made some of my most gullible friends jealous, resulting in half of them cutting ties with me.
In my teen years, I got good at lying to people. Very, very, good. I chose my words carefully, and every story seemed to be a personal experience. So there was no need for proof. If I was called a liar, or if someone made a rude remark, I would say "Were you there when it happened, or me?" People had nothing constructive to respond with, so they often just changed the subject.
My biggest lie in high school was that I was in a relationship. I told everyone this, even my family. My sister tried to debunk it. But since it was a supposed online relationship, she had no viable evidence. "How did you meet?" "At school. He moved away, and we kept in contact by email." My parents didn't question it whatsoever. The time came when I did get a boyfriend. I forced him to go along with some of my lies when he visited. Including one where his parents were doctors, and one where he was a cancer survivor.
Yes. Now I had witnesses. But not for long. I had to fess up to my parents when they asked to speak to his parents. My mom was absolutely shocked. But I made her promise to not tell my dad. I still kick myself for telling the truth because my boyfriend broke up with me a month later.
Now in my older years, I still haven't broke the lying habit. It's gotten worse. I now catfish people online. Once they fell in love with the picture, or asked for a phone call, I ghost them. I don't do it for money, I've denied every cent and gift thus far. However, I have fallen in love with a few of them along the way. But how could I own up to it? I can't because I'm ashamed.
I had a hard connection with one guy, who I kept in contact for 9 months before vanishing. I actually went back to him as a different person in attempts to come clean, but the same thing happened again. He disabled his account the second time I ghosted him, making the guilt so much worse. My only defense was that he was into hardcore DDLG. He had diaper fetishes, bathroom fetishes, and some severe mental problems.
So why do I lie? If you couldn't tell by now, I can't help it. I love the "wow" factor, I love the attention, I love the faces people give me when I tell them a so-called true story. The thrill of being caught might add something to my habit as well.
The Conclusion: I'm never going to stop lying. I'll never come clean and be honest the first time around, but this is who I am. I'm done giving a s***. If you don't like me because I lie, that's your problem. I know who I am. You and everyone else in the world can f*** yourselves for all I care :)