Trapped and sad

I want to get out of my relationship but I know there is a 99% I won't find anything better. To leave now would be idiotic, our lives are so wrapped up at this point. He loves me so much and would do anything for me. It breaks my heart. But I don't love him. I don't even know if I can love anyone? I feel so passive all the time and I wish I didnt. I fell no desire. There are so many things that are wrong. I don't even know if I want kids, he wants kids and assumes I'll have a change of heart.
I want to move. Far away. I want to leave the country. and live a happy life. I hate my life here. I'm so trapped every day, and I know I could do what I wanted if I just had the guts to tell him I was leaving.

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  • My previous marriage ended like this. My wife was unhappy which at the end I could tell. There was no cheating or violence, she just didn't love me anymore or the she was in.
    She never told me but I could see in her actions so I brought it up which seemed a weight off her shoulders. It was hard for me splitting up but I accepted it. Now I have a family. She moved to Australia where she has a new life and career and due to remarry I'm told. So yes leaving is hard but it can lead to better times.

  • Lie back open your legs and let it happen.
    My wife did that.
    I never realized until about 20 years into the marriage that she was unhappy.
    She had gone 20 years unhappy but not saying it or maybe I was too deaf to hear her. Either way, I had no idea.
    4 years later and she left me.
    So stop waiting. Say it loud. Say it often. If he doesn't hear then up and go.

  • I am in a similar situation. I am trying to figure it out too

  • Sounds like it is impossible to make you happy. Find a guy with a few friends and be their s** slave, then at least you'll be useful to somebody.

  • Learn to love yourself and leave.
    I love the only person that I know will love me forever, the only person I will ever trust. I couldn't be happier. I known I'm right. I need nobody.

  • Then leave dumbass

  • Don't have kids! Get a boyfriend/

  • You should seek out a therapist, that may help a lot. Sounds like you're depressed. In one sentence you say you won't find anything better and in another you want to escape. The problem and the solution lies with you - until you deal with whatever you're dealing with, your demons will continue to follow. First, you can leave. If you are that unhappy and your relationship is beyond repair or you just want out, start planning how you are going to leave. It may be difficult at first but you'll figure out a way to make it work. You don't need to jump from one relationship to another. You can be okay on your own. And finding another relationship isn't going to fix what's wrong. If you don't want kids or want kids with your current SO - DON'T. Life is short, you need to figure out what you want to do.

  • My wife left me a couple of years ago and I feel empty and depressed. The other day, while picking up my kid for their week with me, I said to her that she seemed to be handling this a lot better than me. her response was to tell me that she had had many more years to process it than me. This and other conversations has confirmed that she decided somewhere between 5 and 10 years ago that she wanted out. Problem was she did not say so. So I spent all that time trying to be the perfect husband and father. Nothing I could do would ever have brought her back.

  • Why did you marry him you silly woman

  • Way to common that women stay for his paycheck

  • Just imagine your life if you don't leave. More anxiety and unhappiness.

  • This is the opposite side of my unwanted confession. I’m in a relationship where my wife doesn’t seem to want me despite everything I do for her. Trust me, maybe he’s hoping you’ll do it so it’ll spare him the trouble. All I know is you need to be happy, or he will never be. If you keep putting it off, you’re just prolonging the inevitable for both you, and denying both of you try happiness.

  • Follow your heart. Don't have kids to fix a relationship it won't work and is selfish- think of kids.

    Just be honest with yourself and without kids leave how ever you have to, just go follow your heart

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