The truth is right now I do want a big family

Backstory. I realized I was gay in junior high. I had my first real crush and I acted out on it and I got rejected. Later in high school this girl came onto me, she was a d*** which turned me off but that's who I had my first overt sexual experience with, my first oral s** with. I went to college on a scholarship and met a girl and we had a fling for a year, much nicer than that d*** in high school. I learned that I'm not into dykes at all, I like soft girls and holding hands. I can do without all that hard s**, just being together. I'm gay, but not one of those girls.

Then in my senior year of college I got busted with another girl, we have a record for selling pot. I had to drop out, do a year of community service. During that year I met and lived with an older woman who turned out to be a d*** and I had to be her doll. She dressed me up and showed me off. But I didn't have a place to live so I put up with it.

Then I have to go home because my Mom was recovering from a hysterectomy and I had to take care of her. A man friend of hers corners me in the kitchen and grabs me by the crotch, turns me around over the kitchen island and out right takes advantage of me and gets me pregnant. Now I have a kid. I live with him. I have an IUD but he wants it out, he wants me pregnant again. Now, so his kids are not too far apart. I stay home because that's what he wants a stay at home mom for his kids. He wants more kids and he wants them to come out of me.

I want to finish college, he says I can go but first things first, I have to get married, it's not good for me not being married with kids. As it is if I get pregnant now the kids will be three years apart. I should have just gotten pregnant last year but I was scared because of COVID. I never thought of myself as a housewife but that's what I am now. I'll get pregnant, I do want another kid. I want a big family now. I'd like to have four, but give me time, maybe two and then two more in a few years. I like being a housewife, I don't want to work outside the home.

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