Mood?!?!?!?{no cue who to ask though}

First of all I know this is an adult subject but I am leaving all the details out. Despite being about an adult subject this post of mine just pg as I can make it. so I am not giving details at all... I do need some advice though
I have done a thing before that I have not really thought about at all until now. After I watched a certain video which is nsfw but not really above pg-13. I saw a character do the exact thing I do though. I will say a statement with the entention of telling someone {or my voices because I am scizophrenic} that this is something that the {add kink scenario here} would be a horrifying experience. I will even genuinely mean it would be one of the scariest thing kink wise I could even think of. The thing is though my words do not line up with my tone of voice or expression at all. I am on one hand saying how horrified I am at such a thought but my voice portrays this happiness or elation/exctiment at the thought. The strange thing is. It is not even out of confusion. I get it but I don't. I am not ashamed. I just wanted to post certain details first though. It is weird. I mean I get it and don't get it exactly at the same time. I wanted to see if anyone else has this conundrum.
You see. I am an mtf transgender woman and a pansexual on at that. I don't have a type. I have a flow chart of types and type combinations. Plus personalities types that are awesome and would love to date. I can't even keep it exactly straight in my head to say the least plus I run the gamit of just wanting different experience. So why when I run scenario of me becoming a straight girly girl s*** do I go from that okay to saying it would be so terrifying and shaking with excitement. Not literally. I mean I have thoughts about being a lesbian. there epic. not lacking in details by any stretch of the imagination. I will stop though here because I am just going to type myself in circles. i will not post the video that sent me on this tangent though.

Mar 24

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  • What's with these replies.. roflao.

  • I heard a Kpoop song played over a recitation of the Quran. Even kpoop sounds better than some weird Satanic wailing.

  • Let's kick off Ramadan with roast pork barbecque, cold beer, and a dog-barking contest just before the call to iftar. Men in speedos and women in bikinis. Bring your qurans for the bonfire.

  • My lovely pet dog tore my pink and aqua copy of the Quran to pieces. I shouldn’t have left it lying about. Of course, he barks loudly every time he hears the call to prayer. Don’t know why.

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