I feel like I'm going to hurt people I love if I lose it
You should probably work on issues with anger/frustration/lack of ability to cope in the moment, from the sounds of it. A very, very good step is, whenever you're angry or frustrated, deconstruct it. Remove yourself from the situation, take a 15-20 minute time span to go over, "Why do I feel this way", "Is this how I want to feel right now", "How can I change how I feel right now, to change the outcome of how I feel to suit what I want to feel".More time spent looking at nature and taking walks in general will do you a world of good. Greenery and the great outdoors are soothing in general to the human psyche. Life's frustrating, but a good diet, healthy life style, and positive outlook are life changing things when put together. Also make sure you're getting enough high quality rest, since that's something so many of us neglect- it impacts you mentally and emotionally for days, even just sleeping poorly once.
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