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I gained 400 lbs on purpose and regret it
My name is Ashley, I am 23 and I weight 658 lbs and I am 5 ft 3 inches tall. I am super morbidly obese and I did it all on purpose for my fetish and my boyfriend and also simply because I am a glutton. I regret my decision to fully commit to feederism, which if you dont know is the fetish of a feeder (typically male) feeding a feedee (typically female) to obscene levels and making or helping her gain weight to whatever the desired goal is. The problem is my boyfriend who I met in college at 18 is not just a feeder but a sadistic ** who gets off on control pain and ** alongside his feederism fetish. I met him and he was great, he introduced me to the fetish and we experimented with stuffing and I was ambivalent about it but loved how happy it made him. Oh how stupid I was, fast forward 5 years and I went from 258 ish pounds to 658 and I am so heavy I can barely walk without my knees wobbling and my belly (which hangs to my knees) sways so much and I have to lift it with my leg when I walk that I fear falling. Over the years during college my boyfriend and I got more into feederism with more intense feedings and initimacy which enthralled me more, but over time it got darker and more intense and eventually he would have me on the couch missing classes too full to move or speak for fear of projectile vomiting all over my dorm room. He would funnel feed me sometimes and loved to wait until I was horribly stuffed after a meal and couldnt stand easily to funnel melted ice cream into my stomach until I thought I would split in two. I am still with him and am so close to loosing my mobility that I fear trying to leave him, I think he senses my wanting to leave as I have asked to slow down many times only to find him presenting me with an extra meal the next day.
This has led to him stepping up his feeding and has started getting abusive and leaves me all day painfully stuffed and nauseous and therefore helpless to more food, I am afraid especially because I saw his search history and he was looking up a hashtag on tumblr called #death feederism, which after I looked at it scared me to death. Should I go to a hospital or call the cops? I moved across the country for him and for college so my support network is thin or nonexistent since he has become the one source of all my needs as I cannot work due to my weight. Some pay cycles when his paycheck arrives he will say I need to earn my rent and will establish a quota based on a percentage of his paycheck that I need to consume in extra calories (additional to my already insane consumption). This often would result in a couple thousand extra calories a day and a few lbs a week. Recently he has begun enjoying my pain and even though I say I am too full and sick he will funnel me another quart of melted ice cream leading to my either puking all over my shockingly distended gut or immobilized in pain for hours until he returns. How can I escape this? I am afraid he will feed me until I die and I am too groggy, nauseous, and stuffed all day that I cannot move my massive body easily which he often pushes me back down anyway with a donut or cake etc. I am scared for my life.
Sometimes I feel like this is the only solution it's just to give up and accelerate my eating to keep my day-to-day life happy and give myself to the point where I'm such a burden on him that he gives up feeding me or I die I'm thinking of my start eating even more than he expects just accelerate that process and maybe even get myself in the hospital with a ruptured stomach not even kidding. Today I had 15,000 calories before noon it's been 3 hours trying not to puke and the new Final fed me all over the rest of the day huge dinner and then more ice cream after that I'm currently so full can't speak and I'm seeing double. I Make It Sick honestly I can't do that last week..
You know he doesn't need to feed you such obscene amounts of food to keep you super obese. He's doing it to see you in pain and discomfort. That's the real sick part of it and it's wrong. Feeding your fat wife, girlfriend, etc to make her fatter, happy and content is a husbands or boyfriends duty. Just be prepared to take care of her when she gets too big to move. Feeding her until she is in pain or pukes takes all the enjoyment out of keeping and spoiling a big fat chick. My wife is also over 600lbs and I feed and pamper her every day. Even our 2 children get in on the act as they know that a happy, fat, content, mom is better than a skinny, angry, stressed out mom any day.
Just do it, you fat pig.