my own prison

I am gettiing married in 2 months to a girl whom I love dearly. However, she has cost me many things including all my money, my last job, my high grades in college and the ability to see my daughter because my fiance thinks I'm gonna cheat on her with my ex. I wanna leave her but I don't want her death on my head because she has suicidal tendencies.

Jul 8, 2010

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  • Do not marry this woman. She is insecure and has issues. This is no way to live the rest of your life.

  • Dude, f*** that b****

  • ^ Today was my first visit to confessionpost and had to search the site to figure out what the Troll comment was about. I've never heard it used in that connotation before and I didn't know it wasn't acceptable to leave a pseudonym. Interesting. Every other site I've been to, Anonymous posters are considered spineless. Innocent mistake. Lesson learned.

  • ^ Obvious Troll.

  • First, I have to wonder how, \\"...she cost me many things...\\" including your money, high grades and seeing your daughter. It seems that somewhere in there you 'chose' (maybe caved in) to spend your money on her ~ a choice none-the-less. I have to say too, that grades are the student's responsibility. Did you 'choose' to spend time with her because she was so fun/needy instead of study? As for not seeing your daughter, that is completely YOUR choice! Why let your fiance's insecurities dictate your manhood?!? This is definitely the place, as a man, to draw the line. Losing the opportunity to be a dad to your little girl isn't worth any woman in the world!! Please stop playing the 'Victim\\" card and accept the responsibility that some of your choices have gotten you where you are. Now, here's where I take your side. When I was in high school, a guy kept telling me he was going to kill himself if I didn't go out with him. I was torn because I didn't want him to take his life, however, I only liked him as a friend. The more he talked about killing himself, the more I didn't even want to be his friend. He scared me. I did not go out with him and he did not kill himself (thankfully). One thing to remember is that she is using this as a form of manipulation. She needs help. Killing oneself is not a normal coping method. You cannot help her. You cannot solve her problems and marrying her under the guise of 'love' will only postpone the problems for a while at best. It's important too to remember that you are not responsible for HER choices and actions. How she responds to a break-up is 'her choice'. Obviously, this is a very delicate situation. In looking out for her, I highly recommend speaking privately with her family first or those that know her best if she's not close to her family. If they truly know her, I'm sure they won't be surprised by what she is declaring. Tell your decision to them (with much care and humility). Ask her to meet with you after that with her family present or at least make sure her family knows when and where you're meeting so they can come to her immediately. Let THEM help her to get the help she needs. There will be hurt feelings. This is normal. It will be ok. Now, go be a true and faithful dad to that little girl so she won't have these same abandonment issues and insecurities when she's an adult!
    ~A. Woman

  • It does sound like a doomed toxic relationship. The effects of love are null if abuse is attached.

  • i have to agree with everything said above. cut your loses now or you wil lFOREVER regret your decisions! don't be a fool

  • Get rid of her. She's a crazy b****--I'm a woman, and that is NOT how we all act. If you've sacrificed all of that, it's not fair to you. You should have to sacrifice a little bit for a relationship, but nowhere near that.

    If she commits suicide because you break up with her, that is not your fault in the slightest. A stable person should be able to handle that. You can't control the fact that she seems pretty crazy.

  • Oh f*** that b****. She sounds like a manipulative C*** and sounds like she found herself a perfect victim. STAND UP TO HER AND CALL HER BLUFF. You will kick yourself if you miss out on your little girl- cuz long after this b**** is gone, your little girl will still be there. Ditch this b****- and if she kills herself, we'll give you a parade for saving some other dude a giant headache.

    Anyone who truly loves you will want to see you grow and be happy and fulfilled- and would NEVER EVER allow you to give up your means of employment, your children or anything else because of them. The b**** has insecurities and problems to deal with. It is NOT your job to change your habits, ideas, thoughts, wants or desires just because she's too much of a lazy f*** to deal with them herself. Get rid of her. She's expecting YOU to take responsibility for her stupidity and you're agreeing to it- which basically tells her this behavior is ok when it's NOT. Grow a pair, get rid of her and focus on being a father to your little girl until you learn how to make better choices on choosing a mate.

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