The value of life

I think there are levels of depression.
I have it, and I know there are certain days when I feel so depressed that if I were any more I'd just fade away. Like right now. It certainly doesn't help that Chirstmas music is playing in the background about people who have good, fun lives.
I wish people would recognise that I have an extremely difficult life.
I don't even talk anymore. I must have that psychosis where you slowly go into yourself til you lose it. My sadness is like a cloud that is always by my side, a trusty companion.
And to think I'm only 15..
I an't relate to anyone else. All teens care about are their f****** tans and boyfriends. It also doesn't help that my dad didn't give a f*** enough to leave when I was just a kid. Or that my cousin died. Or that I get anxiety that creeps over me like a blanket, paralyzing me with fear.
I don't know where I'm going with this. So I'll just leave.

4 Comments

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  • Wtf?
    Who is posting as me?

    Whoever said "look im not going"........yeah. Not me.
    1st comment- Thank you. You're kind. I agree...the drug companies are so messed up.

    2nd comment- Thanks...for the most part. I'm one of the empathetic people I know, and I never cry for myself. Feeling upset about your life is different than crying for yourself.

  • look im 'not" going

  • whatever you do don't feel sorry for yourself. i have depression and because of it every time i feel sad or anger i remember every other time all at once. sometimes it doesn't make since. live your life be yourself and people can't accept that then move on. look im tell you how to live your life but if you could remember this;someone who cries only for themselves is selfish while someone that cries for someone else is human

  • Depression does indeed suck. Especially when all the doctors and drug companies care about is lining their pockets and not actually curing anyone. I found that self-support was the only thing that worked. Make sure to eat right - seriously, this is VERY important so that your body can maintain a chemical balance - and get some sun or get under a sunlamp once in a while. Forget all that St. John's Wort crap and herbal remedies. Do something new once in a while to stimulate your mind. Make a couple new friends.

    Don't let the holidays get you down. I kind of enjoy not having to buy a bunch of crap for people I don't even like. I just go out and look at the lights, have a nice cider & rum at home and watch movies. Hang in there & good luck.

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