I had a messy breakup with my GF in HS. I have since moved on. And married someone that I fell in love with. I married her, and took care of her, She needed me, and I needed someone to love me. I thought this would have killed my feelings for the girl from HS, but I was wrong.
In our years of marriage, we had a child. But in the last year (during my deployment)she has developed some kind of rage disorder. she will blow up on me for the craziest things. Last christmas she blew up and yelled at me for 12 hours straight because I got her the wrong necklace. She would yell at me, with such vitriol that it causes her to pass out many times. She would throw her wedding rings at me, or make suicidal gestures. She then wonders why I have stopped opening up to her. She tells me that I should keep showing my love for her even when she does "stupid things" and even if she never changes back to the way she used to be, I should still show her my love and pray that I would love who she is regardless. She tells me she loves me, but all I can see is the demon in her yelling at me.
She guilts me into doing her college assignments for her.I feel unloved and locked in a place I don't want to be. Everday is like walking on eggshells.
My dad left his first wife because she went crazy. I can see a pattern.I cant help but fantasize what my life would be like with someone else, someone would act and treat me like a human being.