The New "Gay"

What is the sexual preferance that today will get you jailed or murdered or worse? Pedophilia. And sadly, that is what I have. I don't know the why or how of it, i'm just attracted to underage girls. It's not fun or exciting anymore, it's terrifying. I want a normal relationship, a normal life.. But I can't. And there is nowhere to turn, because if a professional (even a priest) feels you are a danger to society then you will be involuntarily institutionalized. So I must resort to an anonymous web-forum to see if there are any good ideas out there that might help.

Let me list some of the things I have tryed:
Went to church, tryed to get God on the problem. No lasting effect, other than additional guilt and remorse.
Went to a psychitrist, almost was taken away on the spot.
Went to the military, that made things alot worse.
Went to A.A. (At first I thought the drinking may have lead to this, now i'm thinking this lead to the drinking)
Went to a few alternate 12-step groups. Those were even less effective than A.A.
I deleted all the p*** off my computer and vowed never to download any more. Somehow i'm back up to 18 GB, and some of it may not be legal. No, I won't lie, over half isn't legal.

Thats the crux of the problem. It's a compulsion. During the entire process my rational mind knows its wrong and protests, but I continue. And how do I even come across all this trash anyways?? I mean, the cops don't seem this effective...

Anyways, This all come down to the fact I want to try a decent relationship with a girl my age (mid-twenties) and i'm terrified every time she sits at my computer, and every time I think about any sort of long-term life together... I want out, I want this to be over. If anyone has any sort of advice on how to un-do a sexual preference, to reset it back to what God intended, please let me know. Thank you, and God Bless

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  • There's really no way to just turn it off... No one can help who they're attracted to. If you live in a country where it's illegal, you just have to learn to deal with it, and try to control it.

    And believe it or not, there are counselors out there who will listen, the trick is finding them. They can't lock you up for an attraction.. It's raping someone that makes it a crime.

  • Go to another country where you can be comfortable

  • I'm not a sexologist or anything of the sort. Just your average guy i would say. From what you posted it seems like you think thats its wrong. Do you feel that way because of society's standards or do u think its wrong. For example, if it werent against the law in this country, i think other countries girls get married as young as 12. Are you afraid of commiting a crime, a sin or just wrong for an adult to want a young girl. I think you really want a change because you think its wrong. Im not here to judge. Ever since i began wanting to have s** its always been a*** s**. Im not really turned on by the v*****, but its always been heterosexual. I would try it with my girlfriend all the time but she hated it, so sometimes i had to fantasize about doing it in her ass while i was in her vag. I loved her alot so it was easy for me to get and keep an erection with her. sometimes i didnt have to think about a***. Itd probably be best to erase every connection the p***. you havent actually commited a crime and gone past the edge. we're all allowed to have a fantasy thats why people cant read minds. Try to find a Woman around your age to build a relationship with. If you can find love i think you'll be able to resist the temptation and learn to love having s** with her. If you dont think you can do something before then, try getting a prostitute or escort(seriously) have protected s** but have her pretend to be what you want. Try watching regular p*** until u can get off to it and eventually u may train yourself to like women. hope it helps and you solve ur problem

  • Well to start you need to decide that you are done forever. Until you make that decision there is always one more time. You need to delete every file and every singe thing that you have that relates to it. You need to identify the times in which you are most vulnerable and make certain that you change your schedule at those times so you are not alone or you do not have access to anything that would trigger you. When you begin to think those thoughts you must stop and remind yourself that you want a new life. Start a calender and put an X on every day you get through without falling. Make the X cover the entire block on that day so that the Xs combine to make a chain. See the chain grow each day. If you are serious you can change your life if you are just here for attention then you succeeded already.

  • chemical castration

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