Past Encounter - Feel So Guilty
I had my 20th college reunion recently. I'm a long-divroced male, early 40's and talked myself into going to my Reunion. I ran into a number of classmates, the circle of friends I hung out with, including one of those friends named Michelle.
Michelle is a beautiful petite woman - also divorced now but dating and soon to remarry - curly brunette hair to her shoulders, about 5'1", great body.
Michelle and I were friends in college, nothing beyond that, she was dating a guy from her hometown who ended up being her now ex-husband. She's funnier than heck and could out-party pretty much anyone, even me.
One night when in college we had a dorm party and Michelle was lit. With a captial L. To the point where she was incapacitated. I lived in the same dorm that she did, so me and another guy literally carried her back to her room. I knew the combination lock (we all knew each others) to get her door open, so we got her in there, sat her down, 100% out like a light against her bed. The other guy headed back to the party, I said, I'll get her shoes off and get her up into bed, no sweat. I took her shoes off, lifted her up, and got her onto her back on her bed.
What I did from there I still cannot believe.
I had a few drinks in me at that point, for sure. But I can't believe it.
Well first I kissed her - not hard - on the lips, and she didn't even move. She was OUT. I'd always wanted to kiss her.
Then it got worse.
I then slipped her sweater up over her head, unclasped her bra and took that off, and kissed her b****** for a bit. Then I masturbated onto Michelle's b****** three times.
She didn't move an inch.
I cleaned her up and everything, re-dressed her, bra, sweater and all, made sure she was situated in bed OK, and left her there passed out for the night.
I saw her the next day, hungover, and
said, hey, Dave and I got you back to your room, locked it on the way out. She was hungover but shaking her head at herself that she drank that much.
I've never told her what I did. This was years ago, and I still feel guilty. But I never repeated anything like that again to her or anyone, nor would I want to hurt her, she is a good friend. To this day.
But it torments me.
I don't know what to do other than confess it to my Pastor which I've done and confess it here.