Im a bad person

I broke up with my ex fiance of 6 years last year as I am in love with his best friend, we can not stop seeing each other I know we can never be anything real and I dont care. I know it will hurt a lot of people and its hard to not tell people - we have been sleeping with each other for months and hanging out saying we are just friends - yeah right like people beleive that. If we lie enough maybe we will just be friends. He refuses to think that he needs me but everytime we see each other and say we can not sleep together again he cant stay away as much as I cant - we try to not see each other and we can go for about 2 or 3 days without seeing each other but its always the same - we always go back I lie to my best friends and family about what I am doing so people do not know what a horrible person I am - I know I will not stop and as long as he keeps wanting me Ill drop everything to see him.We both try and date other people to forget about each other and then pretend we are not jealous I hate thinking of him even talking to other girls and he tells me not to talk to other guys but we cant be together so why shouldnt we try and find someone else we can be with? I cant see this ending and it scares me I can not walk away and I am going to be hurt I know it - I have a feeling that I will always be that dirty secret because neither of us want to hurt our family and he has a little boy so that makes it so much harder I love his boy and his boy loves me...

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  • Your fiance for six years? What the h***, someone wasn't serious about getting married, were they?

  • he was my fiance for not even a year - we had been together 6 years - Im 23.

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