I messed up...

I think I just screwed up something that could've been great. So the story goes a little something like this. I joined a dating site and started talking to this guy. Usually I'm really shy so that was a big step itself in just saying, "Hi, you're cute." We decided to meet up at a Starbucks after I finished my class of the day. After two really long bus rides, I finally made it to see him. We went to his dorm and talked about everything and anything for four straight hours. There was great chemistry and we even made another date for the next week. We started talking about s** and actually did it. It was great and we talked after and made out. I thought that was okay. He walked me back to the bus stop and gave me a kiss goodnight. Now it is a day later and I randomly decided to say hi. He confessed that he was a little uncomfortable about the night before because he's not used to moving so fast. I agreed because I usually say that I won't move too fast and have s** so early but I was just so in the moment and I let it happen. At the time I didn't regret it but now I feel awful. He told me he needed time to think. As soon as he said that my heart dropped. I feel horrible for making him uncomfortable! I really wish we could just start over but the ball is in his court for now. I'm hoping he thinks it through and decides to continue this, but that little pessimist inside my mind highly doubts that will happen. I always end up messing something up and s******* my own self over in the end. I'm so scared that I might text him and mess things up even further that I set a reminder on my phone that says, "DO NOT TEXT HIM!!" just so I can stop myself. I feel so stupid for letting this happen. I really liked talking to him and we had lots of stuff in common and I'm afraid that since we had s**, I ruined every possible chance of him even talking to me again. I have no clue what to do but I am willing to wait for him because we had so great of a connection. I’m both dreading and hoping for the day he tells me his decision. I’m trying not to get my hopes up but I can’t help it. Hopefully it’ll all be resolved soon and “time” doesn’t mean more than 2 weeks.


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  • Well if all you want is sec then no problem but s** on a first date is not a good indicator for a LTR
    If you want something more the name him respect you by playing a bit harder to get otherwise he will assume that you are a s****

  • Sorry to hear that happened to you and you really seem like a sweet person who should not have had that happened to her. I would not even wish that on my worst enemy. To be honest with you that was a line that he gave you because if he really thought things were moving to fast. He would have stopped before it went any further and he did not. Or the other thing he would have did was have told you but in telling you that he would have let you known he still wants to hang out with you. And would have kept the date no matter what. I know it hurts but I promise you there is a guy out there who will treat you better and not play games with you like this last guy did. I would say to delete his number and to just count it as a lesson learned. Most of all do not beat yourself up over this because you made the best the decision at that time with the information you had available to you. Keep your head. Be Blessed and Be Encouraged

  • he does not like you

  • Well, u need to understand whether he just wanna sleep with girls on dating site and therefore wouldn't want u for next step after having s** with u. If u don't think he is such a person, u should text him and insist to meet up with him as otherwise he might never see u again while he gets calmed and would have walked away from his feelings for you and then would see u like other normal girl. Love feelings come easy and go easy, u should not let it go easy by starting to build up a relationship. Otherwise, u will forget each other in less than a few weeks time!

  • Hey honey, aww that's awful, I completely know how you feel but please please please DONT text him! It's the worst thing you could do because he has already told you he needs to think and as you said the ball's in his court.

    But in all honesty, I wouldn't get my hopes up because as nice as you say he is, I think he's a p**** for making you feel like this. Afterall, you didn't force him to sleep with you! How dare he sleep with you then tell you it's too fast and he needs to think?! I don't think he's worth your while and I know you don't want to see that because you really like him but do you think this is a good start? If this happened to someone else you'd probably think the same thing...

    Hold you head up high and keep that smile on your face because if he doesn't want to see you again, then you know he's a b****** and you deserve so much better =) x

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