My Teenage Story
I am a 16 year old boy from the Midwest. I have been smoking cigarettes from the age of 14 and I am addicted. I have smoked marijuana on and off since then as well, but for the past 5 months I have been high almost every day. I have also done mushrooms, oxycodone, adderall, flexeril, huffed paint thinner, and consumed copious amounts of alcohol. I also feel that I may be aware of myself becoming mentally insane. I have heard voices inside my head ever since I was a child and I have never told anyone about it because I fear of being ostracized. I am also a virgin and I have an I.Q. of 136. I have thoughts of suicide and killing other people all the time, and I sit in my room for 4-6 ours at a time in the dark staring at nothing. I have a deep-seated hatred for my step-father and I have often dreamed of killing him. I have tried therapy but it has not worked. I do not want to become institutionalized. Any advice on my current situation would be greatly appreciated.