Frustration and Guilt

Hi, I'm married but me and the wife haven't had s** in a while. We've been married a while.. we have a 15 year old son. Over the years she's gained some weight and struggled with how she feels about her body. I'm ad avid runner and workout a few days a week. We've been through our ups and downs. I believe I still love her. At one point she shared with me that at an earlier age she thought she might be gay but says she isn't. Sometimes I wonder if she's being honest with herself, or if we're just not taking care of our relationship like we should?
I've resorted to masturbation sometimes. But don't feel good about it afterwards. We met through a church and at an earlier time were pretty active though not much today. Sometimes I will guilty if I do this and not know how to deal with it. I've gone to religious chat rooms to discuss it, taken cold showers but it eventually comes back. I did masturbation again today and again I regret it. The bigger issue obviously is dealing with the relationship but I feel there is no simple easy fix. I will have to talk to her at some point. I will try to refrain for now and work on our relationship.
I'm committed myself atleast until our son is an adult. I hope we can make it and find away through this, but I'm not certain.

Kurt

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  • Counseling.

    Also, take a look at The Sexually Confident Wife by Shannon Ethridge

  • thanks, I will check it out.

  • Exposing yourself to taboos will help you overcome this tricky situation.

    M********* to THE BIBLE!!!

  • Lul!! Dude, there's nothing wrong with masturbating.

    Signed,

    Your Friendly Neighborhood Common Sense Woman.

  • ok, well thanks. I'm learning that feeling guilty about it is pretty lame and I'm trying to lighten up about it. There are different schools of thought on it depending on who you ask. Personally, I think if your in a healthy relationship with someone and happy then it is much less of an issue or urge. But finding and then maintaining that is difficult. Like I said I will try to make things better at home and if it happens I will try not to dwell on it. thanks for reading and commenting.

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