I just can not stand myself. I have a great family, husband and kids who all love me. We are poor as can be due to a lay off. Yet I can not seem to stop binging and purging. Day after day I find an excuse. I don't work due to anxiety and depression. Yet I will have to this summer if he can't find work in his field. It will be hard. If I just can stop the eating I can make - save about $10-$20 a day. That's a huge amount for us. I have tried everything. My depression would probably lessen if I stopped. Maybe disappear all together. I'd be so much happier so why can't I stop? There is a horrid depression as well as extreme fatigue that hits and I get severe craving that drive me to it daily. It is h*** both ways. I keep telling myself - You are already hurting, why not get something for the pain? But I forget all together when the pain and stresses come. My 3 kids still at home say they will support me - my 13 yr old doesn't know - but I still fell I need to make dinners. I will have to get over that. Just like the fear of leaving the food behind. I am done. Helpful comments welcome.