My tragic story of me and my best friend

Hi so I am a girl just to let you know. In grade 7, I met the best friend I have always dreamed of. We had a closer bond than any of the other girls in my school. We said like, I love you, hugged, held hands and sometimes even kissed each other on the forehead. From time to time we would play imaginary games ( yes, I know we are a bit too old to play games like these but..) of being with our crushes when we were older. We would pretend to kiss by putting our hands over our mouths and straddle each other but nothing sexual. But then one day I think we took it too far. We were playing a game of being a 'Once Upon A Time Character' (a tv show we both like) and we would play each other's love interest. It got a bit too sexual for my liking. Her parents weren't home so then we would lie down on the bed straddle each other lie on top of each other and kiss each others necks. Then it happened. I was lying on top of her and kissing her neck when I felt her pelvis thrust onto mine. I ignored it but then I felt it again. I looked at her and she smiled and she thrust her pelvis up again and so I pushed my own to her and did it again. We found a rhythm and dry humped each other and she closed her eyes and started moaning. i did the same and started kissing her neck. She whispered faster in ear and so I did and we both climaxed and got into another position. She sat up and I sat on her lap facing her. We dry humped again. We did that three times until I had to go home. The next couple of weeks after that she would call me her wife. Then we played another game with a bunch of other games and she volunteer to be my lesbian wife. Next I started to have this weird feeling in me. I would get so jealous when she hung out with other girls instead of me. I would ** to the memory of us dry **. And I realized I was in love with her. After a month of being sexually and emotionally frustrated she pressured to tell her who my crush was and I did. Now, I walk around the school alone. I will forever be a closeted bi because now I know being who you are is wrong and you have to be straight. I lost my best friend because of my stupid feelings and I won't let that happen ever again. I confess this because I have told no one and it is eating me up inside. So please give me advice to help me move on. Don't call this because its not. I am starting to crush on a guy at school to help me move one. And the year school is almost over so yeah... that's my story of Grade 7. The tragic story of me and my best friend.

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